This isn't so much a testimonial, you will see, as much as it is gospel, the truth that only a deeply spiritual man like me can convey to the disheveld masses.

Listen! Hear Me! I once read a book, a book that changed my life, and that book was...

The Omninomical Maya in Orbit

Maya is in orbit, I am convinced. She, however, is convinced that she is forever falling, and yet somehow her fall is the very thing that keeps her so far above our heads. She plunges endlessly, silently screaming in a vacuum of her own choosing, above us, to the side, on the other end of the world. A bright star moving too fast, and out of sight before you can confirm that you really saw it. In orbit...

It could be said that what is in orbit is forever removed from the great attraction of its existence. It could also be said that what is in orbit is beyond us all and will see and experience more than any chump trapped in a gravity well could ever conceive. Of course, it could also be said that any metaphor, simile, allegory, or colloquial anecdote cannot convey any truth without first distorting through the lens of experience.

My lens of experience has only focused my appreciation and admiration for this most wonderful person. The focused truth is that I love Maya, and if you ever meet her, and decide that you don't love her, I'll do my best to make sure that you never get a chance to love anyone because if you can't love Maya then you are broken and defective, and should be sent back to the factory to be melted down and put to good use.