well the shit news is I'm in hospital.

The good news is that I finally am ok with telling people this... it's not the 1st time, but usually it's Top Secret. In case people judge me or something., for being born with a couple dud genes.

I can still go to classes which is good. Because I'm pretty over studying, not working and therefore having no money. But yeah. Still sucks. My head's too messy to write anything else right now....

Some good stuff, really good stuff even, has happened recently. But the last while it seems that I've been mostly quite crap and focused on feelings of regret, jealousy, bitterness, pain, anxiety, etc..... as usual when I feel this way, am seriously considering moving. Back to NZ, maybe. It'd be so much easier.... I could go on the dole for a bit while I sort my shit out and I have a couple of friends there who feel like life-friends; a lot of my friends here are really just-for-now friends a... read more

hello there dear friends, london ones specifically.....

bascially it has come to my attention that I really want to go see london after midnight when they play at the carling academy on the 25th of this month. Actually the more I think about it the more obsessed with this idea I become.

The whole time I've been in the UK I've hung out with ravers and hippies and burners, ahahaha, it's time to get back to my roots!! But yeah I don't know if I actually know a single person here who mig... read more

back in london..,
so I'm back in london,
staring out the window of the plane an then the train, I felt more of a feeling of coming 'home' than I've ever felt before. So that's good, I've got a city to call home. I've got a house to call home and a crew of friends who're like family, I really missed both of those things in new zealand.

In hindsight I'm kind of annoyed with myself that I hardly got out at all, socially, while in nz. I've don't have a big group of friends, but I do have i... read more

soon I'm coming back to london; I'm not sure when because I'm on waiting lists for several flights, but the 22nd of sept at the latest. I am quite filled with excitement about this. YAY. Living wth lovelies and studying what I love and maybe I even have a few friends there still..,

The sad thing is my twiggysweetydarling won't be coming until a bit later. Hopefully not more than a month or so later but it's an Unknown Factor which is terrible.

But yeah apart from that I am looking forw... read more