Dear Diary

naked sumo wrestling

   Tue, August 14, 2007 - 10:38 PM
gawd, i love tribe! where else can you find a naked sumo wrestler, a sculpture of the elephant god ganesh, and a guy dressed in gold lame (with a bulging cod piece) who thinks he's descended from aliens ALL on the same page????!!!!!

and get advice for burning man prep! that's right; i'm soooooo excited! i'm reading everything i can get my hands on about getting prepared. my dear friend rio offered me her camping equipment. and total strangers on the burning man virgin tribe have been very helpful.

when i put out the word that i was a virgin who needed a camp, some weirdos (old straight white guys who seem to prey on young unsuspecting women) hinted at trading housing for sex. seriously guys, i'm not that young and i was never that stupid!

i get the sense that there's some seriously weird sex energy at burning man. i like very centered-energy sex, honest sex. i don't like games and old guys taking advantage of newbs. that's just ick. and i can't stand older guys who ONLY want younger women. what are you??? uncomfortable with your own mortality. pleeeeez, grow up.

so i'll try to avoid that mess.

but the rest of it has been good. got lots of tips and am feeling a little less anxious, like i can really do this and that it's going to be life-changing for me.

well, i had a long talk with my boyfriend today. he had wanted me to come see him for labor day but i decided to go to burning man instead. i adore him but i feel like he sometimes takes me for granted and i want to explore and feel passion. i really adore him and he is the sweetest man but he's already had his wild life and i'm just getting started on mine.

before we were together, he used to sleep around a lot since he was the lead singer in his band and he's very good looking and attracted a lot of women. and he used to experiment with substances and stay out late partying. but now he's sort of a homebody if he's not out playing music for a gig. and he's kind of settled down. he has a cat he adores and likes to fix up his house. while he was out sowing his wild oats, i was staying home with my kids and later going to school and then managing a house and working as a social worker filling every minute with volunteering and my kids' events. now it's my turn to be foot loose and fancy free, so, even though we love each other madly, we are in different places.

he's incredibly supportive of me though. calling each day to see what i'm up to and letting me know all about his life. he's not good at the flowers, chocolate and romance stuff. but he's awesome at the best friend stuff and the manly (carries a tool box in his car) stuff and the confident "i can fix anything" stuff. which seriously turns me on. gawd, show me a guy with a toolbelt and a red toolbox in his trunk and i'll show you a good time in the sack! ooooh i love my sweetie. but i let him know that i don't think i can keep his agreement for me not to date guys. i want to date men and women both. especially at burning man.

i get asked out all the time, and so far i usually turn down the guys. but i don't think i can keep this up much longer. i'm truly poly and bi and i've got to act on it.

woo hoo! burning man here i come!


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