God bless Edna

peakRrr — Thu, 03 Aug 2006 02:41:16 GMT

I tried to find hoop tubing at the Sunnyvale Lowes. BIG mistake. I am scarred. I first asked the Plumbing department guy, who at least was familiar with poly tubing although he had never heard of it in 3/4" or 1" diameter. While in Plumbing, I put some much more expensive 3/4" PEX tubing ($50 for a roll of 100 feet) and brass connectors in my cart as a possible substitute. I then went to the irrigation section of the Garden Center to check. I asked the Garden Center clerk, Edna, "Do you have 3/4", 160 psi poly tubing for irrigation? I usually get it in 100' rolls that are around $25 or $30 bucks. I've already checked the plumbing section where I found this white PEX tubing substitute, but it's pretty expensive - I don't need to pay the extra money for my purposes." Edna <blank stare>: "What tubing?" It was then I first had a glimmer of the trouble I had gotten into. peakRrr: "Poly tubing, also called PE or polyethelene tubing. It's black tubing that looks similar to this white tubing in my cart here." Edna: "What's it made out of?" peakRrr: "Polyethelene. Most people just call it poly tubing or PE tubing." Edna <writing down each new term on a scrap of paper>: "Polyethmlarg?" peakRrr: "Polyethelene... Never mind, just call it poly tubing." Edna <more confused than ever>: "Plyothwack?" She looked like Jack from the Jack in the Box commercials trying to say "chipotle," with her mouth in a scribbled line. "What else did you say it had to be?" When I saw the way she had spelled it on her scrap, it even looked unpronounceable to me. I guess it *is* hard to spell. peakRrr: "160 psi." Edna <writing down "psi">: "psi? What's that?" peakRrr: "It determines how strong the tubing is. I need it to have a certain amount of rigidity, not be all floppy." Edna wrote the word "rigid" down. Edna: "Are you doing an irrigation project?" peakRrr: "No, I'm making hula hoops." Edna <writing down "hooler hoots">: "What are those?" peakRrr <dumbfounded - is this a joke? Am I on film?>: "You know, hula hoops? Like the kids toy?" Edna was mystified. How do I explain a hoop in words, without actually hooping? "Um, a dance prop? A big circle of this tubing that has been connected together, that you can play and dance with." Edna <very excited now>: "Oh! Well, maybe we could find you a substitute product!" peakRrr: "I already have a substitute, it's this white tubing in my cart here in front of you. I am looking for poly tubing specifically." Edna: "I'll call Plumbing for you, that sounds like something they would have." She consulted her list of unfamiliar terms. peakRrr: "Like I said, I already went to Plumbing, they don't have it." Edna was already dialing the phone and calling Plumbing. Edna <reading her scrap of paper>: "Hi, Plumbing? I have a customer who is looking for rigid tubes of plathoramwey for a prop for her kid's dance recital. Do you have any of that?" I groaned internally. She really was trying so hard to provide good customer service, I didn't want to just walk away, but it was truly painful. Plumbing, who probably overheard me say "POLY TUBING" in the background purposefully loud enough for the person on the other end of the line, told her they don't have it - shocker. Edna then enthusiastically proceeded to call every department in the store despite my protestations (I knew for sure she wouldn't find it in the paint section) to see if they had either rigid tubes of prethanarthica or a substitute product I specifically didn't want. Finally she called her favorite manager, Kevin, who was actually very helpful and professional, and when I explained the Lowe's in Livermore typically carried it, and I would like a local source so I could be a continuing customer of theirs, he said he would contact the regional buyer on the next weekday (this was a Friday evening) and see what he could do. Unfortunately the only response I got after that was a phone message saying he hadn't been able to get hold of the buyer yet, and then, nothing. When I tried calling his extension, I got the runaround from the Lowe's phone system operators, who were just as knowledgeable and helpful as Edna had been. I've been afraid to return to the Sunnyvale Lowes since then. Shudder.

My Blog

God bless Edna