Song of the Day

Isn't it a pity
Isn't it a shame
How we break each other's hearts
And cause each other pain
How we take each other's love
Without thinking anymore
Forgetting to give back
Isn't it a pity

Some things take so long
But how do I explain
When not too many people
Can see we're all the same
And because of all their tears
Your eyes can't hope to see
The beauty that surrounds them
Now, isn't it a pity

Isn't it a pity, (oh-o)
Now, isn't is a shame
How we break each other's hearts
And cause each other pain
How we take each other's love
Without thinking anymore
Forgetting to give back
Now, isn't it a pity

Cupcakes!

Thanks to the purchase last night of the "Vegan Cupcakes Take Over the World" cookbook I am inspired to post my second blog in two days. Please forgive me in advance.

If I were a cupcake I would be:

- In a silver lining
- Angel food cake with bits of cherry mixed in for a slightly pink hue
- Light lemon chiffon frosting
- crushed peppermint lifesavers and grated licorice sprinkled on top for seasoning

What kind of cupcake are you?

Our amazing brains

The human brain is so powerful that it allows us to change our blood pressure and heart rate at will, as some yogi masters have been witnessed under controlled studies. We can also use it to change our mood from negative to positive or visa versa. The brain also regulates how much pain we feel under different circumstances and supplies us with bursts of energy and courage when we sense danger or an emergency situation around us. Much of what the brain does happens automatically and is very difficult for ordinary people to control. Once the brain starts a process, for whatever reason, there is a cascading effect that is virtually impossible for us to stop or reverse. I have been told that the typical "fight or flight" response typically lasts 15 minutes to a half hour for the chemicals that are released to wash their way through our systems.

I am also learning that the two hemispheres of our brain, the left and right sides. serve two distinct functions. One side, the right side I believe, takes input from all of our senses and holds it as images or sensations while the other side, the left, processes it and makes sense of it. We use one side to be present and the other side to think about the past and the future as we go through our lives. In the absence of the thinking side we also let go of fear, worry, and become at one with the universe around us. Unfortunately, without the other side we also lose the ability to communicate with the world around us as our speech and language is controlled by the reasoning side of our brain. Oh well. I guess you could say that the right side of our brain is a nice place to visit but I would not want to live there.

It seems that one of the goals of meditation is to quiet the left side of our minds and experience the peace and quiet that is in the present and in the right side of our brains. We breath and gently remind ourselves to let all thoughts drift through our minds trying not to hold onto them. It is fairly simple in theory but very difficult in practice. First of all, it takes practice, sometimes years of practice, to learn how to quiet our minds. Second of all, the quiet that we attain through meditation only seems to last as long as we are in that meditative space and the thoughts come rushing back in almost instantly when the meditation is over.

I want to begin to meditate on a daily basis and learn how to sit with a quiet mind for at least a few minutes each day. I am tired of the chatter and anxiety from worry and fear that seems to be always present. If anyone knows of a good source for guidance in the practice of meditation, a book, CD, or program in and around Berkeley I would appreciate hearing about it. If I find any answers or make any progress with this pursuit I will post an update.

Thank you.

Fire Arts Fun

Last night was my night to volunteer at the Fire Arts Festival for the Crucible as a Fire Safety Volunteer. I felt special wearing the bright red T-shirt with a damp towel hanging at my side. There were no incidents or accidents around me and I felt right at home with the fire sculptures I was stationed to watch for the duration of the event. I actually had a fairly cushy job of standing by the flaming cactus garden near the entrance and in front of the stage. You might say that I had one of the best seats in the house.

It was nice to see CTP there although we did not have time to visit with him but I still felt his friendship and warmth. It was my first outing with Mary Bee as she was also a volunteer along with her two housemates, Rachel and Kean. We were able to hang out for a few minutes at a time and ended up on top of the FAF firetruck at the end of the night with Mary firing off the truck mounted flame thrower during the grand fanale.

I am happy to have had the experience and look forward to more fun this summer.

Burning Man bound

My first year at Burning Man was with my girlfriend at a camp from Phoenix Arizona called the "Pyramid Scheme". And what a scheme it turned out to be. Aside from being sick with a nasty head cold before arriving there were some nasty dust storms as soon as I was well enough to venture out of the camp. All in all it was okay year with only minor relationship issues and a bit of the "Burning Man Experience". I think that the first year was the only year I actually watched the burn from start to finish.

The second year I stayed with the "Pink Flamingos", a group of folks from the "Red, White, and Blue" community on Tribe and had a much better experience due to better planning and lower expectations. The atmosphere at our camp was fairly relaxed and easy going. The best time I had that year was when I ventured out on my own for a bike tour along the trash fence culminating in a climb up the 120-foot ladder to nowhere. Considering my fear of heights that was a big deal for me and there was no one around to see me do it. I would have to say that the second year was probably my best year of the four years. Having the tragic events caused by Katrina happen that year did cast a sad spell on the event for me and I returned home almost in shock from the knowledge that while me and 40,000 of my closest friends were running around mostly naked in the desert there were people dying and suffering from a natural catastrophe.

For my third year I made the insane decision to produce a huge art project called "Sugar Cube" to introduce a new type of residential building construction that was at least in part inspired by the aftermath of Katrina. This project consumed the better part of four months of my life and the life of many others including eleven days at Burning Man with less than two days not dedicated to working full out. The Pink Flamingos were gracious to host me and helped out with the project in a big way. I guess you could say that this was the year for me to experience Burning Man from a completely new perspective but it was not the experience I was craving.

Last year I stayed with a camp called "BYB" which translates roughly into bikes and drunks and had a commitment ceremony with my soon to be ex-girlfriend. We arrived late due to major car problems and left early for the same reason. In between there were the worst dust storms I have ever experienced and the worst relationship problems to match. The ceremony itself was pretty much a bust too. That is one year that I would like to erase from my memory.

This year will be my fifth time to Burning Man and I am determined to finally have a true Burning Man experience like those I have heard so much about. I will be going solo this year and although I will know many of the people who will be there I will be staying alone with a camp of people I have never met. The camp is called "Black Rock Bureau of Hospitality" and our theme is to help people who are in need to turn their experiences around through acceptance, massages, relaxing, and conversation with fellow burners in a safe comfortable environment. To me this sounds like just the ticket.

I am renting a van as I did the first two years and I am looking for up to three passengers to ride share with me. I cannot leave for Burning Man until Monday mid-day and will be returning the following Monday along with most everyone else so I am hoping for friendly and positive people to share the journey. If anyone is interested please let me know.

The end of an era

The Volvo was taken away today. Gone to charity and hopefully a good cause. I never wanted the Volvo and it was always a love-hate relationship. She was only mine because the pink slip was in my name anyway. She took me to two Burning Man events but only barely. I have never taken the time to add up all that she cost me but I would say that it was well over $4,000. She had rust that was only getting worse. She was shaky and so noisy that you could not have a conversation when she went over about 40 mph. Her name was Grumblefish, for a good reason.

The last trip to Burning Man was really the beginning of the end for dear Grumblefish. She broke down twice on the way and she would not have it at all if my friend Rob and his ride had not taken all of our water and other heavy supplies for us. I had just had her shocks replaced and her suspension examined but she buckled suddenly on the freeway near Dixon. To make things even more exciting one of her rear tires blew up and shredded just short of Truckee. We limped into the desert on a donut spare and one headlight.

I would like to say that I will miss her but I am afraid that would be creating a false impression. All I can say is farewell and good luck, my ill fated friend.