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offline 31 friends
joined on 09/18/05
last updated 07/24/08
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(c) Alice Daed

I started a new tribe, called LA Flamenco to bring a community of Los Angeles related flamenco dancers, teachers, events, etc. Please join and post info about classes, teachers, events. Thank you!
Sat, April 12, 2008 - 1:43 AM permalink - 1 comment
 
i let you positively touch me
so i get the human experience

all you have to do is always touch my apple
bless my body, border around my bosom
cup my head with your palm, calm and coo me
death is here, im dying, you're my demon
endless eyes of yours, so ever blue, ecstatic
fucking me with blinks, folding me to sleep
this is a grand maneuver - gypsy heartache
how can i ever heal, im hurt - my heart beats hurry
inside the ice is a warm sensation - trust me, i know
just take my hand, just kiss my mouth closed
keep your intentions and focus your gaze
love me. just love me.
maybe to kill me, so i can die of love
nod your head when you agree
open your arms so we can be free
plus, its all a positive experience
quite positive indeed
remember our first kiss
so sudden, like a song about the dark blue sky
tomorrow you can sing again
unless your mouth is full with mine
very positive, am i not right?
well...its almost getting late, but not quite
xxx
yes yes
i want to be your lover in the human zoo
Fri, July 13, 2007 - 9:27 PM permalink - 0 comments
 
a sharp blade to cut
off all my hair, but
carefully

a thin, long thread
very very red
to tie me to a bed

peaches, to cover
my lips, breasts
while you hover

a slap against the back
because ive been bad
and im glad

a chain to raise
my hands to the sky
i like to pretend i can fly

water to wash away
the words i shouldnt say
but i say anyway

beeswax candles burn
and you can drop a drop
when its your turn
Wed, July 11, 2007 - 8:06 PM permalink - 1 comment
 
so delicious and fruity
raspberry jam
raspberry lipstick
raspberry hair
raspberry nails
and toes
raspberry undies
a raspberry scarf
blowing in the wind
raspberry whip cream
covered nipples
raspberry tattoo
raspberry bush
in the back yard
raspberries on the ground
warmed by sunlight
warm to touch
i love you so much
like the raspberry
Tue, July 10, 2007 - 8:59 PM permalink - 0 comments
 
While you watch the water drop
I drink from you, I'm thirsty - I can't stop

When your feet feel the floor
It is not for long - as I close the door

Smell my skin - so clean
Wearing something you haven't seen

It has been too long
I have been growing strong

Mellow out into white bliss
But hold on until we kiss


Fri, July 6, 2007 - 6:50 PM permalink - 0 comments
 
out of all familiar faces
lost in time and in strange places
yours is the one i long to see
in your arms i want to be
in the night amidst the trees
moonlight bathing with the bees
cooking steam up in the kitchen
moaning, screaming, laughing, bitchin'
playing with fire, or with rope
very soon, i wish...i hope
i have heard my name called out
now im calling out your name
i let go of pain and doubt
like a silk thread sliding off my vein
as the shadows of anticipation
dim the lights inside my eyes
i need your love and education
to brighten up my gloomy skies

underneath a tree
a magnificent tree
set me free set me free

Tue, July 3, 2007 - 6:59 PM permalink - 0 comments
 
i was listening to Oriah while driving home, and then later while jogging, and kept asking myself what she said to ask as an exercise to get at the deeper longing:

right now, i ache for...
right now, all i want...
and then she said, tell yourself: it doesnt matter if i ever get these things, what i really want is...

and i just started crying. these are questions i am always asking myself and that is just a part of me, a forever yearning to learn who is marina in flesh and spirit.

i slowly am learning to let go of people and their words, as much as they seem so meaningful because of what the people say or who the people are in my life.

it is nice to just let go, to feel the wind and listen to the birds chirp.
Tue, June 26, 2007 - 8:37 PM permalink - 0 comments
 
...is drinking beer watching L word tonight. Mariah Careys "dream lover" song never sounded so good before! Its funny what people say, but I don't want to say a cliche.

I want to buy this book on Sumi-e painting. If anyone knows what it is, then you know what I am referring to. I have been doing this kind of painting for a little bit and lately I feel like getting more into it...and the fact that I promised some people a few pieces is a helpful motivator. Short and sweet, there's nothing else on my mind. This morning I had a dream I smoked a cigarette and it felt very relieving. I don't smoke, however.
Thu, June 21, 2007 - 8:06 PM permalink - 0 comments
 
i havent eaten so much...or felt this angry, or cursed at people while driving, or just been in this cranky mood since he left on his trip. I wonder if I was keeping things inside to seem like Ive got it more together, or if his absence and the lack of having someone to talk to is making me a little crazed. And lets not forget my new hectic schedule of waking up at 5:20am, getting to school at 7:15am, class from 8-1215pm, work from 12:50 to 6 pm, study from 7-to-about 10 pm. I am SO tired right now. I have no one to talk to. Its so sad. :( I dont have friends I talk to everyday, because I usually would talk to him...this is how....

...overeating develops. Im sitting with my pants button undone, moping, just ate half a cup of chocolate pudding, but I DONT FEEL BETTER. So now that I know food is never the solution and will only physically fill my little oral cavity void, the real void inside just can't be filled yet. I have, however, been doing a lot of this kinda writing, here on tribe, in my journal, and a lot in my head. Thankfully my mental hard drive doesn't need upgrades, but it does need to de-boot once in a while. I think I'd like to do that this weekend.
Wed, June 20, 2007 - 7:52 PM permalink - 0 comments
 
its like 2 am...ive been staying up a lot. i feel nauseated. i cant seem to find myself in substance and instead get lost watching the L word show. the lesbians are starting to look very appealing and sexy. it is hard to be all by myself, in this silence that i hear every so often when the ringing in my ears is gone. i had a thought earlier to go outside and sit on the entrance porch and smoke a cigarette, even though ive never smoked. then i thought i could go drink a beer outside, but i have no beer at home. and wine...well wine just seemed too strong for the feelings i have right now. i cannot begin to transcribe because like i said earlier, i find myself floating, with no weight bringing me down.

is this love? is questioning love? or is love only heated and always reaching out to touch someone? is love the thing that you cant live without, that has to meet you half way and resist enough before giving in? is it the thing that exists at all or is it a word we have given to a group of emotions that happen when we are enamored by a being and how they treat us? that, and mixed with sensuality of course. im not talking about brotherly love here people. i am talking about love.

i dont know what i am talking about now...because it is kinda late into the night, but its good. this is when thoughts come and feelings surface, right in between the closing eye lids. but i do have to say, i am in the mood for chilled bed sheets because it is so hot in here. im in the mood for disco roller skating, for hard and slow neck kisses, for teases, for dressing up in male clothing but keeping the female touch, like in that movie dot the i. im in the mood for swimming and sun bathing, for eating a juicy papaya that runs down my chin, for flying in my dreams, for drinking coconut juice, for taking photographs of people, for someone to photograph me the way i want to be photographed, for mochi ice cream without sugar, for saunas and salt, for beating myself with a eucalyptus leaves bunch in the sauna (i dont know why people in US dont do this...its apparently good for you and can be kinky). im in the mood for refreshing sleep and and alert mind, for jogging in the morning and building my sexy leg muscles; im in the mood for growth and no regrets. im in a good, sleepy mood.
Sun, June 17, 2007 - 2:11 AM permalink - 0 comments
 
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