Home

Now I'm getting settled in… it feels so much like home, more the
outer moonifestation of my dream of home than any place I've ever
lived. My home's southwestern style evokes my Oma's memory… she and
Opa lived down in Santa Fe for a number of years. I guess living free
range for so long made my need for a home so much more acute... and so
much more fulfilling when I found such a nice place. My heart is
opening here in a beautiful way… just living here, being here, is my
beautywalk… my meditation, my gratitude, my art. Sometimes it's so
beautiful that I just have to photograph my sprouts, or my basket of
garden greens. Surrounded by gardens and the endless show of nature,
my mind is at peace… absolute silence comes from time to time, when
the fridge goes off and the only sound is the blood in my ears.

I feel like such a goddess here… spread out, capable, prepared,
strong. My creative juices are flowing, and I feel my body, my
sensuality, crackling with potential energy. Joy's home will always
be a home filled with friendship and love, magic and music… and you
are all so welcome to visit! Swing by and see the ghost towns, the
Great Sand Dunes National Park, the towers of Crestone Needle, and of
course the yummy hot springs.

The song is literally true… herds of buffalo roam not too far
away, and the deer play in the road so I have to stop the car. It's
special to be on my way home from work and see a herd of pronghorn
antelope. A quarter million bats keep the mosquito population down,
and evolve a whole insect biota with long antennae or a giant size
that a bat can't gobble.

I live near the town of Bonanza, at population 16 the smallest in
Colorado! Bonanza means "abundance", and abundance is what I've found
here… an abundance of natural beauty, space and connection. An
abundance of work as well! My watsu practice has grown through
referrals, and I've had lots of work at Joyful Journey Spa.
Apparently, I learned something from all that school, and my massage
has been getting great reviews. I've had to buy two boxes of 100
"Sound Awakening" CDs this summer, and lots of folks have been getting
lessons … I'm even selling didjs now. Some of my friends are coming
up to help me start a didgeridoo factory, where my goal is to produce
outstanding didjs using mass customization techniques.

My new CD is probably going to be called "Colorado Outback", and
I've been traveling all over the state playing atop 14-ers, in deep
canyons, by mountain streams in groves of aspens, by waterfalls and in
caves and the ancient Red Rocks. My little Zoom recorder picks up
immaculate environmental sound, which I am combining with didgeridoo
playing. Just as with "Sound Awakening", I will be doing my own
editing and graphic design.

The economic realities of life in the woods quickly overcome the
romance… it is simply more practical to spend a couple of days doing
massage and paying a guy with a chainsaw and a big truck to get wood,
rather than spending weeks dragging it out myself with my little Jeep
and handsaw. And, with winter approaching, I will no longer be able
to set up my massage table on the sauna deck at Valley View, and no
doubt the work at Joyful Journey will lessen. So I make hay while the
sun shines! I work with my body, and my body is strong.

The home is full of the ancient traditions of my family, photos
of my daughter, folks, and grandparents… there are places for computer
work, for arts and crafts, for exercize and ritual… we had a beautiful
housewarming and mini didgeridoo festival here. Luscious food has
been pouring forth from the gardens and the hearth… layered quiches
with spanikopita or seafood mole on top, salads topped in sprouts and
flowers, my friends' creative wonders from the pizza oven. The
chickens give yolks a deep gold… there's local bison & elk meat, and
wild currants from the bushes all around to keep in honey. An old
family cast iron dutch oven serves as my cauldron, along with a very
witchy-loooking broom. I've been getting ultra-domestic and earned
the nickname "Martha of the Mountains".

Along with the house came a beautiful kitty, as sweet as any I've
ever known … his name is Pearl. He's the kind of cat that likes to
cuddle up, purr, spend some quality lap time, and sleep on the yummy
waterbed with me. He also keeps the house free of critters, except
for the ones he brings in to toy with… he caught a chipmunk and even a
full-size rabbit!

I go up Slaughterhouse Creek up in Bonanza to get my firewood…
old ghost-towney falling apart shacks are everywhere, but so are many
quite modern, quite well equipped houses (such as the one I'm
leasing). Four-wheel roads and rock-hounding are everywhere… the
aspens are glowing their sacred gold in the sweetest time of the year
in Colorado, a place with four separate and distinct seasons (all in
the same day!) The snow has dusted the mountaintops while late summer
rainbows still dance on the slopes, and everywhere the rushing wind.

To the east, the Sangre de Christo mountains rise a vertical
mile… the name means "Blood of Christ" in Spanish. Some combination
of topography and meteorology makes the mountains shine with a deep
red alpenglow at sunset. As I drive to work at 74.9 mph, I feel like
an ant crawling across the valley floor. From Valley View Hot Springs
I can see the curvature of the Earth in the San Luis Valley, 100 miles
by 50, where roads converge at what seems like infinity. The towering
sand dunes are miniscule against the mountain wall… you can follow it
with your eye from bottom to top, and nowhere does it hide behind a
ridge. The mountains are often topped with even higher towers of
cumulonimbus, and as cold fronts approach "flying saucer" lenticular
clouds. This timeless mathematical space cuts me down to size, a tiny
temporary being living my little life amidst the centuries.

The valley resembles nothing but a huge Yoni, enveloped by labial
mountain ranges, bleeding in the moonrise and sunset fire. The
Bonanza mountains bulge clitoralistically at the top of the cleft
formed by the Rio Grande Rift Zone, and I am living, yes, at the very
tip. Each day the rain and lightning comes down to fertilize her, and
she gives birth to a river of legend that flows to the far Gulf of
Mexico. It is a land of great gifts and great challenges, of Goddess
creatrix and destroyer, the fruits of hard labor and the ghostly
shells of broken dreams. With the sudden winds, dust devils, and
desert landscape, it's a bit like living at burning man, full-time.
I'm lucky enough to be in the trees here in the foothills…

At night that vast valley itself is revealed as miniscule as we
stand at eight thousand feet, half-naked of atmosphere, eye to eye
with interplanetary, interstellar, and intergalactic space. The Milky
Way shines with certainty and solidity, the moon so bright I have to
sleep with a blindfold, the planets in their circles and conjunctions
become familiar friends. The first night I was here I stepped outside
and found myself face to face with Orion, reminding me to go buy a
bright orange hat as the hunt begins.

And humbled though I am, I remember that if cells were stars, my
body would be a thousand galaxies… and that I too am ancient, my cells
dividing, evolving, feeding fucking and fighting for a billion years
and more, and onward through my children, words, art and dreams.

The most powerful bonanza is the abundance of silence. I sit at
my table and watch the sun rise each morning, the quiet so profound I
can hear my own heart beat, and the ringing in my ear from having a
front row seat at that Rush concert back in '82. Perhaps the rooster
will coo, or the coyotes yippiyollop in the distance. Quiet and
vastness lend themselves to reading poetry and cogitating on the grand
picture (just as being in the city lends itself to watching the news).
Silence is a balm for the soul… it requires one to sit with oneself,
with all one's feelings, failings, and flights of fancy.

I do miss my traveling days, the freedom to go any which way,
toss a coin on the map and go there. Of course, that's how I wound up
here! I'm living in the place where the dime dropped on my map of
Colorado the day I left Steamboat. I've put a map of the
West up on my wall, and it's covered with pins marking my travels from
Canada down to Mexico, the forests, mountains, seas and canyons that
have become such a part of me. My Cancerian homebody self, my inner
Vesta, has been laying dormant and storing up a pent-up need for
homeyness-- and wow have I found that here. My life has become so
beautiful I have to take pictures!

Come visit.

Remover of Obstacles

Digging through the basement of my life, those storage units...
somewhere down in there was a statue of Ganesh, the Elephant God,
Remover of Obstacles. I stuck him up on my dashboard... Something
happened, a shift in the energy... and BOOM! Two of my storage units
were emptied, about half the stuff gotten rid of somehow, the
Didjmobile fully loaded... and off I went to be a mountain girl again!

I took the southerly route as the long winter was still burying
Oregon, Idaho, and Wyoming, and across the barren bleakness I went,
stopping in the Sierras at a campground where a few years back we had
celebrated Beltane, dancing in the rain. Somehow it was right and
peaceful to be in that place with that memory.

By the way, Happy Beltane!

By the next night I made it to Salt Lake City, where I got to stay
with Marko Johnson, inventor of the didjbox and didjflute, and the
maker of the Goddess Didj. Now the Goddess is in the shop, getting a
fresh coating of epoxy to repair the wear and tear from years of
adventure.

I discovered my storage unit in Steamboat had been invaded by snowmelt
and everything had been frozen to the floor. It took a special run on
a warm sunny day to dry everything and get rid of what had been lost.

Having the commitment to be in one place has allowed me to unleash
certain goddess powers, the ability to rally people and create events
and realities. Getting Watsu therapists in Colorado together, to
practice and play in the water and try to keep our pool afloat...
setting up a Colorado didj festival (the "World Music Gathering")...
performing again at Red Rocks with the Free Jam Society.

A new CD is in the works. My amazing new recording device (the Zoom
H2) is tiny, but gets big sound... up on Dinosaur ridge I improvised
and recorded a new piece called "Dinosaur Feeding, Mating, and
Predation-- Finish with the Big Asteroid"... The towering Mt. Sopris
was the inspiration for "Skier Song", all the more poignant as a
backcountry skier died on that very mountain.

I started working again at the Splendor Mountain Spa in Glenwood
Springs, doing mostly massage and a little Watsu. They are a family
run business, very friendly and warm folks. I'm already building a
little practice here, down by the Colorado River and what is touted as
the largest hot springs in the world. The earth energy is intense,
fiery here, and the summers are roasting... I'm still looking for a
place, couchsurfing about and meeting the incredible community...
natural building, sustainability, locally grown organic everything...

Don't know if I'll be able to stay here... Finding a place to live
here is difficult as it's right in between Aspen, Vail, and the
booming oil fields of the west slope. Rents are off the chart, too
high to even contemplate. How can I find a suitable place for my
daughter and me? Ganesh, I'm sure, can remove this obstacle as well.

Here's what's on the radio:

I'm sitting in the railway station.
Got a ticket for my destination.
On a tour of one-night stands my suitcase and guitar in hand.
And ev'ry stop is neatly planned for a poet and a one-man band.
Homeward bound,
I wish I was,
Homeward bound,
Home where my thought's escaping,
Home where my music's playing,
Home where my love lies waiting
Silently for me.
Ev'ry day's an endless stream
Of cigarettes and magazines.
And each town looks the same to me, the movies and the factories
And ev'ry stranger's face I see reminds me that I long to be,
Homeward bound,
I wish I was,
Homeward bound,
Home where my thought's escaping,
Home where my music's playing,
Home where my love lies waiting
Silently for me.

Tonight I'll sing my songs again,
I'll play the game and pretend.
But all my words come back to me in shades of mediocrity
Like emptiness in harmony I need someone to comfort me.
Homeward bound,
I wish I was,
Homeward bound,
Home where my thought's escaping,
Home where my music's playing,
Home where my love lies waiting
Silently for me.
Silently for me.

lots of love and super huggers,

Joy

Valley of the Moon

And then came the rain...

They said on the radio that if they named winter storms like hurricanes, we'd be on Zach and Zelda. The winds have, in fact, been up to hurricane force! The skies began weeping nonstop, and the inward time began in earnest. My wild child energy subsided, and I took rest between my classes, sitting and doing needlepoint.

Couchsurfing.com is a wonderful website indeed, and a butt-saver in times like these! A charming 50-something couple in Glen Ellen took me in, giving me my own room with paintings on the walls, a gold comforter on the bed, even my own bathroom...

I posted an ad to craigslist for didj lessons, and got a response from an Australian company in the financial district of San Francisco. They wanted me to play their office party for Australia Day (for a handsome fee)-- kind of like selling ice to Eskimos! On that day, 50 mph winds rocked the didjmobile as I crossed the Golden Gate, and I had to hold my umbrella nearly horizontal there at the ferry building. As I played the party, I was surprised by the sadness of the music that came through. Turns out Australia day is the anniversary of the first white settlement... the beginning of a very hard time for the ancestral keepers of the didj.

Glen Ellen sits in the Sonoma valley, known in legend as the Valley of the Moon. (It may also mean "earth village" or "nose") I climbed up Sonoma Mountain through Jack London state park... was Jack London something else! He was a pioneer in sustainable agriculture, and no doubt would be upset to see his land no longer a working ranch.

"I would rather be ashes than dust! I would rather that my spark should burn out in a brilliant blaze than it should be stifled by dry-rot. I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet. The function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days trying to prolong them. I shall use my time."

By the time he was my age, he had been dead for two years.

I got to see the fantastic coast near Bodega Bay, the amazing goddesstown of Sebastopol... carrying my didj at Bodega head I ran into a woman who worked at the same spa I did in Glenwood Springs, Colorado. This kind of thing happens all the time! My world sometimes seems vast, but when I meet people in one place that I know from another, I realize how small my crowd really is.

I'm preparing for my return to Colorado, now buried under record snowfall. Sad to miss the epic season!

I've finished all my massage classes for a 500 hour massage therapist certificate, and even a 1000 hour advanced bodyworker program-- but the last classes (business and ethics) were cancelled :-( so no certificate till May. This accelerated my job search and travel plans, and postponed my visit to Santa Cruz... now scheduled for just before Memorial Day.

The big job right now is cleaning out my storage units, going through tons of memories of my old days, getting rid of stuff (sometimes harder than it seems!), mailing things off to my somewhat reluctant folks, then loading up the didjmobile. It's going to be quite the adventure returning!

My emotions have been up and down... I love traveling but I've gotten really really tired of it! I was ready to have my home base back months ago. There's tons of responsibilities up ahead, and I am starting from basically zero. Finding the right place for my daughter to come home to is the top priority... should I go back to Steamboat or closer to the front range? I'm looking for work all over the place...

I want a real home base-- my own land, actually! A natural-built home, close to wild country, my own pool... my daughter home, a steady relationship, good work that I love... still traveling, but not all the time.

Sometimes it seems like pieces of my goddessworld are disappearing under my feet! One of my most sacred temple spaces, Full Circle Temple in Portland, has been dissolved by its council, closed its doors, and sold off its amazing collection of art. My intuition is that it will reopen in some way... I stayed with two of my friends in Portland... both happen to be priestesses who have started women's circles. One is called Sisterhood Circle (my friend Divya), and the other the Red Tent (my friend Beki).

It's almost happened to one of my favorite pools, too! The Consulate Aquatic Center in Denver ( www.consulatehealingcenter.com/aquatics ) was scheduled for demolition... saved (for now) by a watsu loving benefactor. It's a struggle these days to keep watsu afloat!

Now I'm up on Orcas Island, taking care of my daughter who's sick with the chicken pox. She's one of those kids who caught them twice... poor girl! At least I'm here for her.

super huggers to everyone!

Joy

I'm going to Portland and Seattle

Hi friends a sudden change in plans. My March class was cancelled...
After the storage unit is emptied, I'll be headed northward to
Portland and then the San Juans, to see my daughter for her 13th
birthday. Then I'll be off to Colorado for a job interview.

I hope to see folks in Portland -- I will be getting rid of lots of
stuff from my storage unit there as well!

I want to say farewell to Full Circle temple... Portland woman's
space... I'll miss the many transformative connections, the sacred
space...

super huggers,

Joy

Soulstice

Once again I boarded the ferry boat, setting sail to a far
island... the off-season allowed me to find a hotel with a sweet view
for next to nothing. The snow came down almost to the waterline, a
beautiful backdrop to our early Christmas, complete with sledding down
roads closed by a mere inch. My daughter couldn't believe that they
won't close the schools in Steamboat for any amount of snow, only if
the temperature gets down around 40 below... brrr...

Olympia turned out to be a creative cloudburst for me. First I
stayed at my friend Matty's place... he is a didjmaker par excellance.
He was happy to shoot a video of me bellydancing and hula hooping
with my didj, and even kind enough to reshoot a bit when it became
apparent that I had pulled a Janet Jackson ;-) Then it was off to see
my awesome old friend Liberty-- ze has gotten all settled down with a
house and a sweetie. I had a chance to record some music, including a
nice set with didj, drums and accordion.

I made an attempt to get through the stuff in my storage unit in
Portland... one thing I got out of there were lots of pretty dresses
and other clothes. All the way back down I've been appreciated and
worshipped as a goddess (it could also be the 18 pounds I've lost!).

In the winter in Portland, cabin fever sets in... one night at
3am, on a friend's couch, I woke up to the sound of her drunken
housemate screaming and yelling. Another housemate engaged in a
number of rude, agressive behaviours towards me, then tried to kick me
out. "You're just a random person I found on the couch..." In his
mind, I wasn't paying rent, so he had the right to treat me as
miserably as he liked.

Needless to say, this situation reminded me of the vulnerability
of being "free range." Living as I have with little money, I have
discovered a disconcerting reality: people without money can be
targets for all kinds of meanness. That's one of the big tradeoffs to
the amazing love, creativity, and beauty that is possible in claiming
one's freedom.

I went to stay with the women at Full Circle Temple, which has
its own share of drama! My time at the temple allowed me time to get
in touch with my friend Shaula, who by all accounts is still there
after her passing last year. In the temple, in the cold dark of the
year, we spoke of deep dreams and mysteries, and played Scrabble.

As soon as I could I headed south. As the road to California was
iced over, I stopped to soak at the Ashland wellsprings, which landed
me right at Mount Shasta on the winter solstice, four years to the day
after I received the sound healing that led to my great spiritual
awakening. I met some musicians there, a Canadian singer-songwriter
named Kim Lorene, and a drummer from mt. shasta whose name now escapes
me. They brought me up on stage and I played a few songs with them,
including some goddess chants.

I made it to Harbin and made a sweet reconnection with my friend
Hugh, who has read a lot of the same books I have about genetics and
human migrations. It's so nice to have a this sort of intellectual
conversation!

Even though my Christmas is completed, I still have to get through
the holidays. It's the first year that I haven't spent with my
parents (money issues again). I'll be serving Christmas dinner to the
Harbin resident community-- I'd love to find a nice place to spend new
years.

Now that I'm back in California I'm ready to settle myself into a
home base so I can work my way through the rest of school, unpack
three storage units all in different states. I want a home base I can
leave and come back to, and not feel stuck in! I want to jam and play
music, learn more didj and dance, practice my watsu... and do some
good in the world. I would be happy to settle back in Santa Cruz, or
up in Marin or the north bay, or near Harbin... up in the Sierras
would be nice as well. All of it close to The City without actually
living there.

solstice huggers to all,

Joy

Where is free range?

I tried to register for a worldwide didj meditation given my shifting coordinates, and I got this reply:

--------------------------------------------------------

Dear Joy,

could you please let us know where 'Free Range' is.
which state and if possible what the longitude and latitude is

Thanks
Seasons Greetings and keep on didjing

<...>

video of Joy doing bellydance, didj, and hula hoop at the same time

Here's a video of me bellydancing, hula hooping, and playing didj all
at the same time


www.youtube.com/watch

be sure to tell your friends.

super huggers,

Joy

Community of Communities

I realize in my travels that I have connected in amazing ways with so many communities along the west coast and in Colorado... I am blessed to have deepened my web of connections within this community of communities.

I wound up a whole month at Harbin, and got to serve the dessert at Givethanksing... (I got to put whipped cream on all the pumpkin pie *YUM*)... it's been a great growth of shakti energy, through healing waters, giving and receiving massage, sacred connections, and sound healing.

In Portland I got to see my awesome friend Divya, who has grown into her priestesshood and created a women's circle of her own. Her poetry moves me deeply, and we are involved in beautiful sacred creative processes together!

I was blessed to spend a week at Breitenbush hot springs, doing practice healing sessions for the staff, playing a little sound healing show, teaching didj lessons and selling CDs. My awesome friend Chad hosted me, which allowed me to stay during a time when the community was closed to the public, and I was able to do Watsu in a swimming pool filled with hot springs water!

Soon I will go to visit my daughter, and also see my friends in Olympia.

When I return to California, I am going to receive training to be a laughing yogini and teach laughter yoga, as well as complete my bodywork training... 500 hour certificates in each of Watsu, Shiatsu, and Massage. I've also been invited to go on a yoga tour of four corners... I will offer group sound healings on a regular basis, pursue the Didgeridiva dance/hoop shows, find musicians to play, tour, and record with... and possibly moonifest a creative home base with my amazing friends!

I'm going to get a field recorder for Christmas, which will allow me to capture the incredible acoustics of the didj in nature, and you will be able to hear my adventures! I'm also going to use it to make radio shows and books (and when I get my hands on a video camera, even better!). Some of my friends, who have urged me for years to write a book, have offered to interview me and help me with transcribing my words. What a creative burst is in store! I am in search of a place which is supportive of sound healing & didj jamming, has access to pools that I can work in, and has energy that nourishes my writing and creative work...yummy!

Super Huggers even to those I can't see right now... lots of love vibration to all...

Joy

Joy is IN the Northwest!

Yes I finally made it up to Portland, and I'm on my way to Breitenbush to do healings for the staff. I'll be around for a little while as I'm unpacking my storage and preparing to visit my daughter in NW Washington. So hopefully I'll see all the peeps in Olympia and Seattle.

A month at Harbin was transformative spiritually and physically...

drop me a line, see me while I'm here!

love,

Joy