i don't know where to start

i guess i'll just talk about me. im 28 years old and have been xdressing since i was a boy, like about 9 or 10 years old. i remember my first time dressing up i was at my friend's house and he dared me to wear his sister's clothes and walk around the block. i did it and got my sexual first hard on from it. i loved it!! but i had to pretend i hated it so i could make my friend do something worse. lol

after that i started dressing up in my mom's clothes whenever i was at home alone. sometimes i even got daring enough to wear panties under my boxers to school! then i graduated and tried community college for a couple years, but didn't do too good, so i quit school and started working for safeway. i still work there, but everyone i work with is real straight laced and kinda conservative, so i can't be open about being gay or wanting to dress up. :(

but for as long as i can remember, i've wanted to be a girl. the last couple years i've starting thinking a lot about taking hormones and just going all the way. i feel so much like a girl inside and i hate the way my body looks as a guy. does that make me nuts? i don't know, but it's the way i am.