Spanky forwarded this to me...and I just wanna know...can I just take a nap for the next three weeks?!?

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On Monday, May 26, Mercury, the planet of communication turns retrograde in changeable Gemini, sending communications and travel plans into confusion. Adding to this cosmic chaos, Neptune, the planet of truth and lies, also turns retrograde on the very same day! Your logical and rational mind will turn into a mush of confusion, forgetfulness and will most likely be totally spaced out. Travel might be disrupted and be subject to monumental delays. Flights might get cancelled, luggage lost, connections missed. You have the inside scoop, so be prepared!

Neptune rules dreams and ideals. This is a great time to use meditation to reach your spiritual center. Neptune is also the planet of exposure and uncovers lies, fraud and deception. During this retrograde, which lasts until November 1, all kinds of secrets might be uncovered and put into the spotlight. The truth will be out!

In general, Mercury rules thinking and perception, processing and disseminating of information and all means of communication and transportation. Mercury turns retrograde three times a year, but the effects of each period differ, according to the sign in which it happens. The focus for this retrograde period, which will end June on 19, is on communications since Gemini is directly ruled by Mercury.
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Seriously...I am excited about the truth thing, that seems cool. Even if it's hard I always would rather know the truth. But mercury retrograde in Gemini makes me wanna hide! and then to have it start the same day as the Neptune retrograde...that seems like asking for trouble!

and I have noticed bizarre things happening the last few days...I wonder if it's just getting ready for the truly bizarre?

I play these games with myself, I don’t know if this is how other people get their brains to work the way they need them to…I’m betting not. But this is how I do it.

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One I’ve talked about a lot before is that I created a habit of always asking myself “What if this was someone else I love?” as a way to be balanced about how hard I am on myself. If this was someone else I love would I understand? Would I be kicking their ass? If this was someone else I love would I be pushing them to do more? Would I be expecting them to be perfect? To be over this? To be completely graceful and gracious and without anger? Would I expect them to step up and talk to someone about this? What advice would I give them? Would I forgive them?

It forces me to put things in perspective. It forces me to explain why I won’t forgive myself if I would forgive someone else…and that usually leads me to extremely valuable insights into me and my expectations of me. It forces me to treat me kinder then I would or damn well explain why.

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Another one I play all of the time is “Maybe this is good because…” I play it with little things and giant things. One day I was behind someone who was driving bizarrely and suddenly going way slower then me and then seemed necessary so I got crabby and slammed on the brakes and missed the light sitting behind them. It’s automatic now most times so as I was getting crabby I stopped myself and said “well maybe I was about to get a ticket and they saved me” and I looked up and there was a sign on that light saying it had a red light camera and I soooo would have run through on the orange and ended up with a ticket I can’t afford in the mail.

I also do it for big things. Those are harder…but I find it is always true that they happened for some good reason I couldn’t see at the time so my faith keeps growing. Lots of times on the big things I can’t necessarily think of what the good thing might be, but I still make a point to decide very clearly that this must be for the good even if I can’t see it now.

Playing this game literally makes me happy. It keeps me positive, it reinforces my faith in things working out for the best, it keeps me moving with positive momentum. I do know it is a game and that it’s possible that the good reason I imagine is just in my mind…but more than anything else I find that playing this game makes me more the kind of person I want to be. It keeps me serene, it keeps me from being negative or feeling a lack of abundance or any need to fight with people over stuff.

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One that doesn’t come up very often but seems to be a huge help in the hard times is “worst case scenario” I find it’s very helpful for me to play with other people. The game is you take whatever you fear and you figure out the worst case possibility.
So often we have fear and we do whatever we can to avoid the vague thing we fear…but if we can identify it clearly and shine the light of day on it…it loses so much power. Maybe that requires talking to an expert to find out how things work or maybe it just requires thinking it out.

There was a time when I had a fear that my ex would try to take my sons from me. It was not a founded fear but it pushed me to panic at the hint of the idea of it. He played on that of course. But it wasn’t founded. As soon as I made myself really look and figure out what is the worst case scenario? I realized that the worse case was that he’d blow a lot of money and make me blow a lot of money so that a judge could tell him that he has no case. I talked to my lawyer, I said it out loud and people laughed at me it was so ridiculous. Seriously inside my head it was so dark and horrible and scary…and outside of my head it was so stupid people(including my lawyer) laughed at me for being worried, how could I be worried someone who is going to jail could possibly even begin to take my sons, how could someone who spends months without any contact suddenly come in and take them from their mother who is there everyday and who everyone would testify is a good mom? Even if I wasn’t going to jail he wasn’t taking the boys away from me. Maybe getting a new visiting schedule that would stress me out but even that is not going to happen while he’s in jail.

So I had to adjust what I feared. I can be worried that he’d try that and that it would suck and cost a bunch of money I don’t have and be stressful and hard on me and my loved ones and and and…but the deep down fear disappeared. Because I was willing to face it, willing to really use my imagination and call up the worst possible thing…and see if it could ever be true. That one had some layers to it too. Once the first vague fear was gone then I was afraid of what would I do to pay for the lawyer if that happened?!?(hell idiotboy did do that to me in a teeny way by fighting over stupid stuff and making me pay a lawyer thousands of dollars I don’t have) But again I played the game and another layer of fear was ripped off because I know I’d do whatever I had to do to pay what I needed to pay. If I had to have 3 jobs I hated and sleep 2 hours a night and give up eating anything besides popcorn and water…I’d do it. It’s where my stubborn streak does me good. And even as I know I would do that…in my head it’s playing the worse case game and knowing that would not be necessary.

There are people who should NOT play the worse case scenario game…it’ll push them in the negative momentum, it’ll get them all worked up and spinning worse than ever. But for me (and interestingly enough most of the Tauruses I know) it is like cold grounding water on my face. I can face anything if I know what it is.

So…am I the only one who does stuff like this? Plays games with my mind to make it do what I need it to do?