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There are three broad categories for how and where CMNM occurs --
1) planned situations where both parties involved, the clothed man (males) and naked ones are participating willingly and in predetermined locations (such as a bar, Pride event, male strip club, male lap-dancing, or private group sex parties. Some examples are nude nights at some gay bars, or stripping contests, or amateur strip nights, or hiring a nude escort or sex 'massage' escort (not to be confused with a real licensed masseur or massage therapist). Some are these 'planned' CMNM events are a part of a larger men's gathering or nude or sexual retreat - CMEN, Burning Man, or Street Festival (Southern Decadence in New Orleans or Dore Alley Fair in Cisco).
2) pre-meditated, semi-random or semi-accidental one-way CMNM (this is a very gray area - so it's not clearly definable).
In these only ONE of the two manipulates (or at least it appears that one side is cognizant and the other side is ignorant (or innocent) of 'planning' or 'willingly' participant in sexually stimulating their counterpart. So the exact environment or conditions are very important but also very unique and specific to the situation (like good timing while visiting your Uncle's home, etc) so that one male can either be nude or be the clothed one who enjoys seeing the nude male in a place where nudity may or may not be expected. One essential determining factor is whether power/control and whether the sexual arousal is experienced by both (Clothed or Nude) participants and more definitely whether or not it is a voluntary act or coerced or forced on the other party (by force, persuasion or manipulation that physical or psychological or social or even some combinations of all three.
3) accidental or unintended CMNM experiences (like when someone opens a toilet stall door and exposes a naked (or masturbating/erect guy), or getting locked out (pushed out) of a hotel room by college buddies, etc... ). There are all kinds of variables that come into play and thehuge extremes in the level of conscious and unconscious sexual turns-on with all of these variations. the subtleties or the directness (blatantness) are different for every purpose and every person.
Certainly, one aspect of CMNM involves flashing.
Flashing is a form of exhibitionism - from mild to wild to extreme - exposing one's body, specifically the genitals and/or buttocks (or breasts in women) to another person or group of people (who may or may not be clothed). Mild forms of it are 'accidental exposure' or peekaboo flashing -which are so very common among some social groups and situations -- so much so that it is absolutely NOT even regarded as any form of 'sexual' behavior at all - especially in some circles or subcultures.
Peekaboo flashing often takes the form of nudity at college boy dorm and social events or frat parties, nudity at sporting events, rock concerts and public events where young and often drunk people gather to 'have fun'. But it also exists on a more personalized basis .. such as between college dorm roommates or when regular handymen or deliverymen come to a person's house (sometimes repeatedly) and some accidental exposure to (male) nudity occurs. There are legions of stories -- many probably urban legend -- about the voyeuristic adventures of pizza delivery boys, UPS truck drivers, and newspaper delivery boys - some of which they have documented (in blogs, Youtube, porno, etc) but more they themselves often are actually the targeted brunt of someelse's desire getting naked-for-the-pizza-guy prank. I have a strong feeling that many times such 'jokes' actually have latent homoerotic desires or sub-currents underlying the 'urge' to strip or to have someone stripped.
Why then would getting the guys naked or panstied or teabagged be the NUMBER ONE
hazing or college party pranks for seemingly millions of boyish breeder-types (twinks and young college or NON-college men up to age 30 or so). Spend some time searching YouTube or similar sites (or more blatantly risque or explicit video-sharing sites) to get a better idea of what I am talking about. The following is a written interaction about how to flash a plumber. It was originally posted on DickFlash (a publically accessible discussion forum) on January 14, 2008. Within it, you can find some of the basic issues and nuances of what CMNM experiences are all about. One of the discussion participants on DickFlash posted this message and request on January 14:
"This guy came about two weeks ago to work on my sink in my kitchen. He had the plumber's crack thing going on, but in a good way...he has a nice ass. I know he's married with kids, but he was very talkative and friendly. I want to know how to "accidentally" flash him. I'm not sure the "I have to take a shower..." thing is going to work. I need something more subtle. The thing is, short shorts aren't really in fashion these days, or I would slip a pair on and let my balls "accidentally" fall out or spread my legs open, etc. Any suggestions?"
I'm good at coming up with possible ways to flash but I don't
often really put them into practice.... so take what I say with a huge grain of salt. By way of further 'excuse-making', let me explain -- I don't live alone (4 people together) and so can't arrange 'things' so easily for workmen or delivery men flashes. But here are some suggestions... and some advice.
1. The baggy shorts (not just shorty shorts ) or mesh shorts might be one option - You can wear them or sit so that he can look up them (or see through them) and carry on your 'friendly' banter. If you just act like you don't know any about what he's seeing it would probably work.. but if you are like me.. it's the being seen that is the arousing part.
If you have to completely IGNORE his act of seeing, it is ....well.. not like flashing at all. But it might work differently for you. Anyway, just think about it especially from his 'point-of-view' (so to speak), do you think he is going to engage you in a long, friendly conversation while you are 'blatantly' sitting there with your balls or cock or asshole in full view (or partial view). Most married men (unless they are closet gay voyeurs) will politely turn their eyes or simply back off or turn around .. even if they make a joking comment about it or are not embarrassed by it.. it will make them slightly uncomfortable. Then he'll be more wary or even resentful...for having been 'friendly' was NOT his intention - he's probably NOT just chatting you up .. but he's passing the time amiably because it's not a very fun job -- except for those times he gets to actually talk to his customers.
If he is THAT comfortable with seeing a nude male and chatting, then you could probably try something much more direct. You've met him before so to start out with something 'new' at this point may not work either, but at least you'll have some ideas for the 'next' time (another handyman or deliveryman). For example, explain that you are a nudist (or you can use some wording or terminology to disguise this and then 'explain' what that means... such as a naturologist or FKK scientologist (hey.. like a nude Tom Cruise fan club member) or that you are practicing nude yoga or nake self-massage, essential oil therapy or some such ruse... as a spiritual discipline and this is your morning (afternoon) to engage in your regular session. If he doesn't baulk, then ask him if you can be nude in front of him now because you always make it a practice in at the time and you need to meditate in the nude. He'll probably believe you unless he's also Asian - the typical WASP North American doesn't know anything about any religion or religious discipline other than their own (rather narrow) Protestant or Catholic dogma (and many barely even know much about those - although they pretend to be 'Christians'. For white Americans (of a
certain age) it would be so non-PC (i. e. politically incorrect) to doubt you or to call your 'nude' religious practice into question because to appear to ridicule it or doubt would be tantamount to prejudice or discrimination - most people will not say anything.
In fact, if he's really 'interested', he just might show so much interest and encourage you to take off you clothes or ask you to explain it or show him how you do it... then you'll have to be able to bull-shit your way through an actual sample session. What is important is that you need to believe in what you are doing. You have to really have a plan and a clear purpose in your strategy. Actually believing in something helps you actually come up with some ideas (on your own) that will work FOR YOU (to actualize it)..... When you don't believe in something you want to do (and why you want to do), it becomes all too self-evident to others and to yourself that what you are doing is just a ruse or fake.
People are masters as self-delusion - but they can smell out fear or a fake a mile off (not that they always mind or even complain). We (here on DF) can make suggestions that are excellent or extensive (or until we are blue in the face)...but YOU are the one who actually has to make them work or not. It helps enormously if you really believe it too. Think also about why you want to flash this guy... is it the naughtiness that stimulates you? or the sense of having sexual power over someone (esp a stranger? or do you think you might have a chance to get laid or have sex or are you looking for a romantic/sexual fling? Flasher, know thyself.
2. The 'shower' thing is about the only plausible other reason (rationale) that you could have for 'accidently' exposure 'beside the flimsy clothes or the nude meditation.. I know you love showing your butthole, Rimluvr -- we've seen that sweet and delicous little bronzed pucker here on DF more than one occasion.
Scenario A.... Leave your cellphone in the kitchen or bathroom or whenever he is going to be doing his plumbing stuff.. and be sure to have set the alarm on your phone to make it ring while he is in there. You could set multiple alarms to 'simulate' getting a call first from some and talking just minute to tell them you are getting in the shower, and and then have a second alarm set 10 minutes later - perfectly timed so that you have to come bounding out of the shower or whenever you are -- practicing nude yoga, etc in the room. You may need to leave the phone where he can' t see/reach it.... among your dirty clothes or in a pile of fresh laundered stuff... etc.
When you then come running into the room (or even jump out of the
shower or laundry room or where) so try to 'get that important call'... either you'll be nude (and dripping) or clutching a towel.. or you will 'loose' the towel then your 'clumsy' hands try to get the phone open and up... He won't be able to ignore a phone ringing (if you've got the right phone it will sound just like a real ringtone and will continue to ring 4-5 times -- just begging to get his attention too ..
Therefore, he'll have backed out from under the sink or wherever just in time to see your towel drop and your exposed jewels or rose-bud come into full view... it would be even best if you have the phone strategically placed to that he can't avoid staring up into your crotch or buttocks.
You could also pull of that phone trick by using your cell phone to call your landline (extension in the kitchen or getting some to do so).. No.. I'm not volunteering. But you could even get your mother or a friend to call you at exactly a certain time (say.. to wake you up or to help mind you to bring in the recycling bin (or whatever).
3. Combine all or some of the above suggestions... Answer the door in mesh clothes, explain about your 'nude yoga' or naked scientology mediation session, then have the phone (alarm) set to interrupt you. You have to sound convincing so you have believe it. It's easier to believe when it is not a lie - so start practicing Buddhist nude oil massage and Naked Zen meditation today.
Hope you enjoy my suggestions and advice... Kelly (sunbuns).
P.S. I have lived too many years in Asia and now I spend so much time in Hawaii -- where East and West mix so well ... so I guess I have been indoctrinated - one way or another.
The spirit is willing but the flash is week day and weekend!
Submitted by sunbuns (as hardtwoholed)
NOTE: This entry is a compilation of excepts from several gay medical fetish sites, including the photos.
You have never seen such fascinating CMNM scenes anywhere as those in a hospital or medical clinic. Maybe some twinks didn’t like to visit the doctor's office earlier. They are embarrassed or reluctant because they think that they may pop a boner once the doctor starts examining them. But after an incredible sexually enthralling visit to a doctor who knows just how to examine them thoroughly and to make them relaxed and sexually satisfied, I think they will change their attitude about being with an older and clothed physician.
After seeing so many twink medical exams, many things will change in your mind too. It is impossible to be calm witnessing how a twink take off his clothes and then the intelligent, sexy doctor starts to suck his stiff cock. They even try sixty-nine, sucking each other’s dick with uncovered pleasure right in the doctor’s consulting room.
Are you interested in hot gay medical CMNM ? It is high time to relive all your secret desires. It is hot to see handsome boys get undressed for the doctor and then seeing them get so horny that they just have to have gay sex. It's great too when the muscular athletic boys go to visit a doctor with the coach, who is dying to see his young team get naked and willing to offer hard dick and hot wet holes to their athletic mentor. The boy doesn’t know yet what incredible adventure it is going to be there. He comes to the doctor’s consulting room and takes off all his clothes. The lustful doctor doesn’t waste time and starts to caress genitals of the twink. It is pleasure to watch twinks medical checkup. It seems the boy doesn’t object to take twink medical exam. His cock becomes bigger and bigger. Then the boy lies on bed and horny doctor sucks his dick, play with it by his tongue.
Every time nasty college guys walk into the examination room of a medical checkup they lose their minds when what they’re told what to do there by irresistible authority of the doctor. Sure, male doctors clothed in green scrubs or a white medical uniform force naughty young guys to do these things because they love watching nude guys pose for them, and obey their every command to expose various parts of their anatomy and to submit to manual manipulation of their bodies and genitals.
Of course, the horny naked young dudes love when they have their naked bodies examined all over so that they are craving to have their dicks sucked and asses banged hard by the naughty clothed doctors I think we all enjoy witnessing cock-loving physicals satisfy the wildest and the dirtiest of their dreams together with young inexperienced college guys.
What about you? Did going to the doctor and being physically examined as a teen by a clothed (older) man leave an impression on you? Or even cause you to think about being attracted to males. Do you think it was especially sexually stimulating because of the fact that you were naked and he was completely dressed. That's the appeal of CMNM experiences.
up with a friend he'd made in the US.
He would not go into much detail but his 'friend' and he had made plans to meet up in Hawaii for 5 days. We had a good conversation and eventually I learned that his friend would not be arriving for another 12 hours after we landed. So I asked him if he wanted to hang out with me, go eat breakfast and spend some time at the beach.. He agreed and I had nothing better to do.
We eventually headed out beyond Hawaii Kai - just passed Sandy Beach. I do not think I was doing anything evil or trying to manipulate him -- I asked him over and over again he wanted to go to Waikiki Beach or we then tried stopping at Hanauma Bay but it was too crowded (no parking available). After a few stops at scenic points and beaches along the way, we eventually got to where I wanted to go -- I told him I liked to sun myself in the nude and it was a deserted beach.
I guess I was hoping he would join me, but his sense of modesty (or str8ness) held him back.
We headed out to the deserted beach and there was a local fisherman -- who probably would not have minded my nudity but my new friend's reluctance and sort of bashfulness
left me high and dry and hot as a new lava tube ... Eventually, I told him I wanted my tan to be ALL over and asked him if he minded if I got naked since this was what I usually did when I went to this beach (nude sunbathing on Oahu is not legal, but you can do so if you are discreet - -actually that's true of about anywhere on the planet). I am not into flashing the world -- I just wanted to flash this cute guy and it got me hard thinking about his reaction -- I mean there are absolutely NO nude beaches anywhere in Japan.
However, contrary to what you might expect, there ARE plenty of opportunities for exposing / flashing and male-male nude camaraderie in Asian countries, particularly Japan. I have posted pics and whatever in posting at the freeballing ... dot ... com site about cross-cultural freeballing or more often exhibitionism.
I know.. I know.. I'm getting off subject.... OK
Anyway, I pulled off my shorts with the boxers underneath which had been bulging since
we sat down together on a beach mat we bought at the local stop up the road. Before that, I had been strategically placing my crotch so that he could try to get a look up my shorts. If I could tell that he was interested in what he was seeing, I would have gone further faster -- but he played it real cool -- maybe because he IS cool and not turned on by male nudity. I could not be sure so I went further. Nevertheless, that just made more anxious to show off more to him.. so I started dripping pre-cum copiously.
After I pulled off my pants and sat there naked, he apparently seemed to be afraid to stare -- probably because he noticed I was dripping a pool of pre-cum or maybe he was like a deer in the headlights or shocked or whatever..
It was totally hot to be naked in front of such a casual acquaintance -- and the fact that he
totally agreed to let me undress in front of him was a big turn-on. So I didn't mind that he did not jump my cock and gobble it down.. it was actually hotter that way. If I want cock, balls and ass, I can get those at another beach (nameless but you can probably guess) or at one of the gay sex clubs in HNL) I will save describing my adventures there for another time.
I regretted one thing -- that I did not ask him to take a photo of me -- or even better with both of us together - -him full clothed and me naked.
At least for now, the only kind of public flashing I can do is the accidental exposure - "you weren't supposed to set that" type. I have found that some parks (depends on the country and the city) are great for this type of spontaneous 'naturist' flashing and other are not.
I have already written about how guys in Japan who are with their teams -- often change in public parks and just outside public ball fields -- you can sometimes get quite a show when they strip down to nothing or try to jump out of their athletic gear and into their street clothes.
There are other places where I have experienced something a bit different. It seems that there is 'room' in society for a lot of male public nudity in Europe.
Donau Insel (Donau Island), Vienna
Link to info about nudism on Donau Insel (Donau Island inside Vienna on the Danube River):
Donau Island in Vienna and its excessive public parks along the Danube River were excellent for this kind of 'innocent' flashing. Along there somewhere may well be a section that is totally nude, but I couldn't find it. It is easy to take the train (subway) to one of at least two stations along this public park-way or arrive at one and walk (30 min) to return via the other - which is the way I explore the area.
I found that you were more likely to just happen across a nude man or women or see people pull of their clothes to get into the water. A few couples were going at it .. like a woman giving a guy a handjob under his shorts, but it is mainly a family like atmosphere - -but with some nude people mixed in - typically as singles. the long thin island is where I walked and then sunbathed nude, although there were a lot of people on the opposite banks -- the river is quite wide so it was not easy to see what state of undress people were on the far banks.
What I liked is that you could change clothes (and flashing cyclist) or pick a spot up on the embankments and just get naked, or go for a nude swim and it was not a big deal -- at least not for the casual observers who might glance your way.
Obviously, Englischer Garten in Munich would be another place. However, it was raining hard when I was there in August a couple of years ago, so I wasn't able to get naked.
Innocent Flashing Spots:
Can anyone recommend other places/parks/ public recreation areas where this can easily happen (in North America or elsewhere too)?
Much of the US tends to be so puritanical about nudity that people are likely to call the police on somebody who just is peeing, let alone actually sunbathing nude in a public park.
However, there are a few places and also some special events where public nudity is tolerated - even downright encouraged. One of those is the WNBR (World Naked Bike Ride) held in the northern climes around the second Saturday (or Sunday) in June. See the WWW site: www.worldnakedbikeride.org/
When I lived there and travel to Tokyo, I found it somewhat erotic - although more frequently just plain frustrating and irritating -- to be crammed together like sardines in a train car. Especially during morning rush hour, there is invariably a time when your body or someone else's in pressed up against your front, back or side. Most people try to appear oblivious and just pull in their appendages, and bear it (not bare it), but there seem to be quite a few men (both str8 and otherwise) who seem to enjoy it.
I have had my share of being groped or at least rubbed provocatively by Japanese men on trains. Some of it, of course, is completely accidental. However, there were times when it definitely was not so innocent or at least was mutually pleasant -- to put it mildly.
One time I could feel the guys cock rubbing against my leg - I am taller than many Japanese men (altthough younger men are getting taller and taller as the years go by). He was obviously enjoying the sensation because as we rode along and the train just got more crowded, he proceeded to get a full on erection.
Another, I was on the Keio line leaving Shinjuku at night and it was very crowded. A young guy seemed to not only welcome have me pressed up against him, but he turned himself so that our crotches would be pressed together. This wasn't actually either of us groping, but the force of the bodies and the movement of the train keep us both aroused as we were smashed together at the groin.
There is an urban myth among gays in Tokyo that men who are seeking mutual accidental encounters (rubbing, groping or even stealthful mutual masturbation) will congregate in the last car (or is the first car). Once I saw a tall foreign guy in overall apparently getting a hand job from a shorter Japanese man (last car on the Chuo (Orange) train.
Finally, there used to be a wild event on or near Halloween (Oct 31) on the Yamate train (green circle line around central Tokyo). Each year, hundreds of people in costumes would all meet at Shinjuku station at 9:00pm and then jump all together in the same train (literally filling up the cars like morning rush hour, then at the next stop, everyone would rush like man to change cars -- sort of like musical chairs. I participated once and ended up being videoed on the national television news (since the media decided to show up and film the event). The JR authorities did NOT appreciate it -- especially since some 'regular' passengers were bumped into or caused inconveniences (like not being able to get off the train).
After one such Halloween Train Rush a few years ago, there was a lot of trash (beer cans, wigs, and pieces of costumes) left on the Yamanote (Cirlce Line) trains - because most everybody who had participated was drinking or already drunk by the time the wide train parade got going (typically on a Friday or Saturday night). One guy who I befriended while riding this mad Halloween train rush, was wearing nothing but a yukata (casual cotton kimono) and proceeded to show me that he had nothing on underneath it.
Male-Male Sex in Public Places
Japanese men are not completely bashful - while modest in daily life, they certainly are not adverse to getting their rocks off and men of all persuasions will sometimes have sex in public trysting spots -- called 'hatten basho.' These cruising areas are sometimes in posh locations or in department stores and shopping centers, at public parks, and at the local swimming pools and gyms or sports clubs.
[This topic was first brought up on the forum of Xtube's : CMNM Group by bostonguy22. He also posted the same question - see the first two paragraphs (under a different id) on the CMNM Forum]
Is there any way to go about setting up a CMNM (or, for that matter, just plain NM) scenario with guys you know--without freaking them out? I know a guy or two I might like to have such a scenario with (maybe with some touching or contact but not necessarily any sex), but I don't know how to actually go about approaching the issue in such a way that I don't inadvertently transgress any of their personal boundaries and/or make them uncomfortable.
Like, my roommate, for example. I'd like to be naked around him or with him, but I can't very well say "Hey, dude, can we hang out naked sometime?" That might really weird him out. But, if there were the potential for him to be open to it, it would be something I'd want to do. But, I don't know how to approach the issue at all. I don't how to approach it in a way that I could find out if he'd be open to it without simultaneously risking offending him or making him uncomfortable. Any thoughts?
It's partly going to be 'hard' (lol) for you to pull off (no pun) this scenario if you are not willing to be naked yourself. What I'm saying is -- if you have already been living with roommates and you've not had even any chance for them to see you naked (except just an accidental glimpse) then it probably means that 'nudity' is not (yet) a acceptable part of your 'household' lifestyle or relationship. In order for it to 'happen', you probably need something pretty radical or unusual to cause a change in the status quo. Examples might be: a new roommate (adding another) or exchanging one, or your moving out and finding different roommates- -more accepting or adventurous ones. If that's not an option or you do have an inkling he might be 'ready' and then you shouldn't give up. You can bring 'egg' him along by subtlely and sometimes more drastically forcing the issue and get your naked body seen and maybe his along with it.
By the way, nUdity / cLOthed situations don't have to happen with ONLY people you know -- there are many other kinds of situations so instead of beating a dead horse (lol).. perhaps you need to take up another tactic or seek a new kind of CNMN activity with a set of guys who are more amenable. However, there is a special nature to being naked/clothed with someone who you know, like and can get along with - after all that's one definition of a friend. I realize too that for some people, they 'need' that special bonding with someone, and the CMNM experience may not have much meaning or much excitement if the person is a total stranger. Yet, some guys can only be excited if the person is an unknown stranger. Even luckier when you get to have both. Nonetheless, you've got your objective in mind ... so how do you go about getting to that place where you're both comfortable or at least accepting (i.e. not outraged or embarrassed) by one of you being naked in front of the other?
Tactics for setting the right environment for CMNM and for setting up the sitution with a roommate:
If you going to be living with this roommate a while, there are some ways I can suggest that you can try to set-up CMNM. More than likely you'll just be to getting him and - more likely - yourself) to being nude at certain times when you're together at home. These initial times should be when you are both at ease and relaxed, and then these opportunities can later start get more frequent and perhaps more daring.
Try to come up with natural, unforced occasions when you can get naked in his presence or at least allow him to see you nude. Changing for bed or getting into the shower. In some case, there may be things you can do outside of the apartment/house where nudity would be expected - such as changing at the pool or in a locker room - so that you've seen in other naked where it is expected and inconsequential.
For things to move beyond just such occasional glimpes, you may have to 'set up' some of these
situations -- if it's something that's not been any part of your style of living.
- Such a 'set-up' might be forgetting something like a towel or wash cloth when you're in the shower, or running out of soap or shampoo and having to come out to get some (or one that you just bought but 'forget' to bring with you.
- Use your cellphone to ring (set up the alarm to ring) while you're in the tube and you rush out of the bathroom naked "not knowing he was there" story to grab your phone.
Let him catch you naked a few times innocently.If you are now walking through the house/apartment nude, then it might seem strange to just start doing so.
So you first have to get him used to seeing you in various states of undress.
Start by coming out with no shirt or lounging around only in your boxes or athletic shorts. Later try to set up more 'naked' situations where he catches you naturally for longer than just a quick glimpse and with more visible exposure of your body and genitals. Be sure to intersperse brief innocent exposures with the longer ones - you don't want to raise anxiety by him beginning to think you are targeting him. Also, it would work best if he's also the naked one at times.
This might be his knocking on your bedroom door (to get something you borrowed or that you share - cordless phone, vacuum cleaner, etc) and then him seeing you naked when you casually answer (call him in ) or even open the door. If you have separate bedrooms and you're nude doing something like trying to untie some knotted shoelaces (and you may have the stereo/TV on) or headphones on (so you can't him knock), it appears totally nature and casual for you both.
Talking about sexuality and the male body
It may be helpful - not only for your friendship with your roommates - but also as a way to get everyone in the the living environment used to commenting on (or even discussions) of the human body (male and female), being male, and acknowledgement of sexual urges and needs. You don't have to describe in exquisite details your own sexual exploits all at once, but at least , you should be able to talk about the basic nature of human sexual needs. The topic surely comes up - -if not from you, then through the media.
References to sexual things often come up in movies and TV sitcoms, even news events, and from other friends, so you or your roommate can offer your own comments, opinions or experiences. "Boy, do I know what he's talking about there." It helps to make the other person feel comfortable knowing that you're willing to express yourself on sexual topics.
This assumes that you're already watching TV or videos together. If you're not even spending that much time together or conversing, it's not going to be so easy to share a nude/clothed lifestyle together.
1) Start freeballing - that way you'll already be half naked. Your roommate will get used to seeing your cock, balls and butt if you undress where he can see.
2) If he's too uptight, he'll keep looking away or even ask you to dress in your own room. They will give you clues about how to proceed.
3) If this avoidance behavior persists, especially if he mentions it or draws some attention to it (like leaving the room), you could confront him about his being too uptight or too restrictive on your own personal freedom. 4) If he jokes about it, then you could also joke back with him.. 'Try it out, you might like it'. Just be upfront (and clever).. " seeing me naked doesn't bother you, does it?" How would he answer that but say 'No, not at all."
5) Start a new activity that involves him and you -- and the possibility of nudity - swimming for fitness, gym, fitness club, yoga, weekend sports, jogging, weekend trips or day time outing to the lake, beach, etc.
6) Always sleep in the nude so it won't be strange for you to be naked in and around your bedroom, also when you and he get to do some overnight trips or camping, etc.
7) Get a friend (or a bunch of them) who are nudists (or who like being naked or doing naked stuff) and whom you visit or go out with - taking your roommate along. These friends can invite you and your roomie to get naked. Whether he's gay or straight or maybe better when he's with a woman around, the 'pressure' of your friend's request might help him to break down the barriers so he'll actually get nude too. At least, you can accept your nudist friend's invitation - so you'll be naked in front of your roomie.
8) Have a party! Alcohol seems to be a great excuse for getting rid of clothes and inhibitions. Costume or themes parties can make it easier since invitees are already out of their regular attire anyway. Or plan special party games that require the removal of clothes - sometimes a necessity if things get wet.
9) Dare and double-dares will some work -- especially if the other person just needs a good challenge (or a safe excuse) for getting naked.
Below are some additional suggestions offered by other members of the CMNM Forum:
NakedDevil on Sun Nov 23, 2008 7:25 am
Well, with a roommate situation, it can be pretty easy. Just walk from the shower to your room naked. Or, even though you know your roommate is coming home, pretend you didn't and while your naked say something like, "oh sorry, was doing laundry and didn;t know you were coming home." Then gauge his reaction. But with others you know, it might be harder to set up an "innocent" situation. If you're looking to arrange something with strangers, craigslist.org is a good place to post.
grubernowski on Mon Dec 01, 2008 7:38 pm
Here's one approach I've used with a new roommate. First, tell them I like to sleep naked. Second, go to the fridge for a drink (or something else you take at bedtime). Go to the fridge naked while he's watching TV or doing some other passive activity--and say something along the way to him, like "Is that movie worth seeing?". After that you'll have some more opportunities to be naked in various situations and (in my experience) he'll eventually follow suit. Whether it leads to sex is more a matter of agreement between the two of you, though a compliment on his "equipment" might foster some action. by Grubernowski
Please add your own ideas / suggestions as a comment or better yet, visit the CMNM Forum and join in the discussions. P.S. There is also a CMNM group on Facebook. Kelly (sunbuns / sunbuns99)
Roommate CMNM - How to get it started without risking offense
For one thing .. CMNM is about what it says it means = clothed males / naked males - it's just that that can mean a lot of different things too.
It's not exactly the same as flashing a total stranger - although it could be that. While the guys involved may be strangers (or even friends/acquaintances) there is a usually mutually agreed upon enjoyment for the nude guy(s) as well as the clothed - which is not always true when flashing - the flashee gets an eyeful whether he likes it or not.
For some, it's about dominance and subservience that matters.. so an element of hazing is desired -- commanding and obeying.. but I'm not really keen to get in those type of role-playing games (BDSM) with total strangers - whom I'll never meet again.
So how this CMNM event that can be accomplished with guys who meet in a public place for the first time will depend on who participates and where it happens.
So that's another reason why I couldn't write the details... they are put together yet. I'm only a visitor - staying 3 days/2 nights.
We could meet the first night (Thursday March 20) to plan what to do sometime the next day. Another reason for no details is security.. Putting all the details about precise location and times and everything may get the word out better.. but it also opens it up as a target - there ARE people who in the world who have nothing better to do than badger or humiliate men who love men. So it's best to leave the details fuzzy on publicly visible boards - such as dickflash.
So far only a couple of other guys have indicated a desire to join..- actually only two guys on this site, and a couple from elsewhere... (the CMNM blog and grou.ps/cmnm) but also.. no one has any given any real ideas about what/when/where or how such a CMNM meetup / hookup / party can be or should be.
A few years ago when I tried to get a CMNM event started in London, I had some trouble getting it started. Actually, I don't live in London nor do I really know it that well.. but I have been to London several times and can get around. If you do a bit of looking online, you'll find that the address is an accommodation There is several possibilities. Since I'm already booked for a short stay there. I was thinking that our CMNM event(s) could possibly center around that location. I've had plenty of opportunities to be naked (or see naked men) while staying in a hostel.
One problem is this one is not male-only - although it depends on the room and how many guests are staying. Also, in some hostels, local residents are not allowed to stay or sometimes the guests are not allowed to have visitors. I don't think that's the case.. but I'm not exactly sure. I've heard that the shower rooms afford some chance to some 'accidental' exposure.
We could do something so innocent as
1) meet in the in-house bar/restaurant for drinks or snack,
2) come visit me in my dorm room - and then get around to getting somebody naked - either one of our 'cmnm' group or maybe some of the other guys staying in the room (is that unethical?) -- maybe? But it could be a whole lot of fun.
3) having a party in the room and play strip poker (or an easier kind of game where the loser has to remove a piece clothing until some (or all are naked).
4) More clever would be for several of our 'cmnm' group staying in the same or nearby rooms and then pretending not to know each other.. .. so we can get some going like one guy jerking off in his bunk, and then another guy (our member joining in). It would get some of the other guys (not our group) horny and they would join in the fun... Maybe a little farfetched... but you never know until you try.
Outside the hostel... it's very large and could be very crowded
5) doing some naked dares and having buddies to watch out / bring your clothes to a rendezvous point, or take photos, etc. ...
6) going to a bar/club where nudity is either allowed or required
7) perhaps some one would be willing to host a small group in his apartment, office lounge after hours..etc...
8) Another idea is to have pre-selected roles for a type of simulation - visit to a doctor's for an exam. One guys in the patient, another two play the role of physician and or specialist, there could be a male nurse who gives sponge baths... Am I losing you here?
There are other roles that come to mind.. but it takes a bit of energy, a passion for realism but fantasy, and a place where that could happen. I've written more than I had thought. Let me know what you think or how you would see if working?
If you can make any suggestions, it would be great.
Question: I wanted to see if you had a group of CMNM in northern Indiana for me to join? Any ideas and/or contacts I could make to join in the area? Thanks.
Answer: So.. what do you do when you live in a rural area or far away from a metropolitan area?
Are there any local groups and if not, what you do to get one started?
(Answered by 'sunbuns', Kelly Lewis, editor and admin, Guys Into CMNM blog and social networks).
While they may be members of one of our several social networking (online) groups who live the your area, Northern Indiana (or southern Mich or northwestern Ohio), I don't think there are any real (off-line) CMNM meetings or events -- at least not yet.
CMNM hasn't been recognized for very long and it's still not commonly understood - even by the very men (particularly gay men) who are so turned on by it. There are elements of it in so many activities / situations that are NOT simply sexual by definition. For example, there may be a men's nudist group in your area or close by. While many don't advocate sexual behavior at their events, some don't prohibit certain types of opportunities where naked and clothed men can intermingle.
Another form of CMNM often occurs in certain male sports or fitness situations - joining a YMCA, or other type of fitness club, or amateur sports league often gives a guy (CM or NM) a chance to interact with other males in clothed or naked situations. Obviously, there may not be any overt sexual behavior but it can nevertheless be highly stimulating.
For overt sexual situations, you can try a gay baths/sauna. I think Toledo has at least one, and there are certainly some in a few of the major cities around you; likewise a few gay bars have events where nudity (or semi-nudity) is condoned, or even where it is encouraged in backrooms, or enclosed patios, etc.
Of course, you can try to start a group -- or at least - hold a CMNM event in your area. I have lots of ideas and would do as much as possible to help promote in on our blogs, and social networks, etc. Depending on when it's held, I might be able to attend or organize/host part of it (I'll be traveling in North America from August 1 - 30 -from Hawaii to New York, from San Franciso, California to Provincetown, MA).
One way to start is to make your interest known by joining one (or all) of our Guys Into CMNM social networks. You may want to use a separate email address (since your real identity may expose you to some unwanted noisiness or scrutiny). However, in today's world, it has become less of a problem publicly admitting that one is gay. However, homophobes and morally self-righteous extremists still exist (and may actually be thriving).
It's probably obvious but it will take some initiative and some effort on the part of at least one person to get such an event or group started. However, even one is not enough. Therefore, you have to try to encourage or attract guys to actually participate FIRST as people -- not as sexual objects. If you try to 'round up' a bunch of hunks for your own private orgy, it's not going to work unless you look like a male fashion model and have the body of an Olympic athlete. To be realistic, most guys into CMNM are just regular guys. The guy down the street or the one who works at the mall or in local office building. What's it going to take to get them to come up with the courage to attend a CMNM event. My advice for guys trying to get a group started is to first make it a fully clothed gathering to initially.
Then a part of the group's activity can be to do something that involves nudity for a fairly short and non-threatening, fun activity - such as ask (or hire) a nude model for some sketching of the naked male form. Or watch a movie where male nudity is a recurring theme or important point in the plot. Hold a pool party or barn dance, play badminton or horseshoes, and allow some of the participants to disrobe. Set up a fashion night or a costume party in which the 'models' strip for a certain 'runway' event or make it a fund-raiser for charity by letting the audience bid for removal of each piece of clothing for some 'lucky' or willing volunteer who, thereby, gets stripped.
Sexual behavior (penetrative anal or oral) does not have to be involved - especially when the group's members are just meeting for the first time. If there are sparks, then it's better that things develop slowly so that everyone knows the boundaries and feels comfortable acting within them before starting any more 'aggressive' types of CMNM behaviors or situations, especially those involving domination or humiliation or mild bondage.
It's not easy but it can be done. It's just not going to happen over night and the key to first find a couple of others who are interested and also willing to be patient with the slow development of the group. Most guys who are turned on my other men sexually just want to jump to the wild orgy -- and that's NOT going to happen in most cases. If you want sex with strangers, then use Craig's List or go to a gay sex club, or travel to where there is one.
I know I've gone long to answer, but it was a good question, and one whose answer I can attempt to make an appropriate blog entry. Good luck and let me know how I might be able to help out.
Kelly Lewis, "sunbuns" - editor and admin, Guys Into CMNM blog and social networks
VISIT THESE SITES BELOW:
( Our blog which also links to CMNM groups)
Or use the simple URL: winksite.mobi/sunbuns/cmnm/
(The 'newest' Guys Into CMNM site. It's mainly for use on mobile phones,
but can be accessed on the Internet via a computer too).
(This is a mishmash of different sites and tools that, in effect, works much the
same way as a single integrated social network does).
(You need to be logged into Facebook before you can find this one.)
(A simple but still working Guys Into CMNM social network site)
(An experimental social networking site that works across multiple devices: PC, iPad, iPhone, etc).
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