Okay so maybe im old like the authoress, but damned if this isnt the best blog rant ive read in years. Made me almost nostalgic to the point of dragging out my 19th century victorian smoking jacket, pouring myself a nice tall absinthe and listening to my Cocteau Twins..ON VINYL!



http://www.angelfire.com/scary/mermaidinblack/id7.htm



Goddess bless The Dark Mermaid.

Nice scenic tour this time as we payed Charon the extra silver coins for the VIP tour. Nicley done. Over all the weekend couldnt have gone better. The weather held a perfect window of sun and heat to rechange my much failing soalr cells. Dont get me wrong i love the rain its part of my gothic self styling to love most things gloomy, but its been a bit over much of late.

We traversed miles of desolate ranges, camped hiked, four wheel drove and had basically the sort of time i needed down to a T. Blessed are my special group of freinds who all seem to be on the same page mentally each year when we make this trek. Without them the journey would be far less meaningful. They say a picture is worht a thousand words so ill just let the next image give me fingers a rest. I need to go watch Doctor Who and sleep the sleep of the dead. This is the view from our campsite at Middle Palm Springs and the mountains pictured are the Inyo's, covered with a thick layer of snow still this late in the season..Awe inspiring.

http://people.tribe.net/e91c4c2a-fcc2-4538-83ed-68c3eb7bf3f9/photos/0779bac0-8488-450e-8b5f-356ce3b08f4e

Yes it is in fact time once again for our yearly scouring of the soul and forging of the heart in the desolation of Death Valley. I relish these trips..very few places on earth have such desolation and beauty living together in equinimity.

For me it is also a blessed respite from this soul sucking, dreary rain. Normally I can handle the heavy rains of my tiny remaining slice of North American rainforest, but this year they seem particulary oppressive with each drop falling like a rejected lovers tear instead of the usual nourishing, cleansing baptism of spring.

The desert doesnt cry.. it is merciless, unforgiving, cruel. Yet it is also honest, purifying, warm and clarifying. It brooks no foolishness and clears the mind of the unneccesary, it is the earths father personna, its anima, as opposed to the forests motherly animus.

And it is here I go for my once yearly rebirth, a walk of 14 miles through the Saline Valley to purge my past pains and long soaking in hot springs to soothe and heal.



I seldom post lyrics, prefering to scribe my own verse, but in this case a song by Patty Griffin has seemed to haunt my thoughts as the rain has haunted my days and so I close with their words echoing in my thoughts.

I leave with them and will leave them in the desolation..



"Rain"



It's hard to listen to a hard hard heart

Beating close to mine

Pounding up against the stone and steel

Walls that I won't climb

Sometimes a hurt is so deep deep deep

You think that you're gonna drown

Sometimes all I can do is weep weep weep

With all this rain falling down



Strange how hard it rains now

Rows and rows of big dark clouds

When I'm holding on underneath this shroud

Rain..



Its hard to know when to give up the fight

Two things you want will just never be right

Its never rained like it has to night before

Now I don't wanna beg you baby

For something maybe you could never give

I'm not looking for the rest of your life

I just want another chance to live



Strange how hard it rains now

Rows and rows of big dark clouds

When I'm holding on underneath this shroud

Rain..



Strange how hard it rains now

Rows and rows of big dark clouds

When I'm holding on underneath this shroud

Rain..



Strange how hard it rains now

Rows and rows of big dark clouds

When I'm still alive underneath this shroud

Rain Rain Rain...

It never fails. I try to be kind and not slag someone in a break up and then find that they have spent their entire time doing nothing BUT slagging me?? Geez, why must it be during a break up that the friends have to get divided up amongst the split parties like the CD collection? Isnt it bad enough that YOUR dealing with the upset of things but you have to share the misery wealth and set friends against friends?? Sigh..over all a disheartening thing, but you know what I STILL wont muck rake..and when i get up in the morning I still like who I see in the mirror..So good enough! At least ive never compromised my heart for some cheap, meaningless short term solace!