after frazzling the nerves of me and my family and roomies for *years*, then going so far as to STOP PAYING RENT last January because he had decided the house should just be his, then threatening to call CPS and try to get my kids taken away from me, we started making it *really uncomfortable* for him back there. we couldn't officially evict him cuz the landlord won't give us any kind of paper lease proving that we have any more right to be here than he does... so. after asking for 'just 2 m... read more

i just came here to write about putting up FireFall tomorrow without Nicole...not realizing that the last time i posted was about Nicole. i am still shocked every time i realize just how much a part of my life she was. is.

the last time i was preparing for FireFall i was doing it with her. two nights ago i sat here working on volunteer scheduling and suddenly realized that one year ago, on the wednesday night before the event, she and i (and a six-pack) were in my garage sanding and paint... read more

was thinking the other night of my recent theory that most of our societal issues stem from our collective unwillingness to accept death as a natural, unavoidable part of the process.

we're not allowed to wash/dress/mourn our dead. the physical work of casket building and digging a grave were an important an cathartic part of that process.

we waste SO much time, money, effort, on trying to stay youthful. makes it near impossible to embrace now when you're trying to be in yesterday.

... read more