Under the bridge

Like yous didnt already know...

tommytroll — Thu, 18 Oct 2007 05:53:01 GMT

TROLL! approves! In fact Addisman might even be a troll xcept dat TROLL!s not like ta get dat close ta fire. Pissin off half da peoples at da man might be worth it though. Two claws up for Addisman. TROLL!

Calling ALL TROLLS! Virtual hit on JASON LEE

tommytroll — Mon, 18 Jun 2007 19:33:05 GMT

http://people.tribe.net/jasonlee TROLL! MAD NOW! Stupid Moderator kick TROLL! from Burning Man tribe. TROLL! gonna tear him to little shreds and feed him to ravers. First TROLL! need you to spam his message box with POO and da Burnin MAN message crap until he add TROLL! back ta board. Dis guy gotta suffer!

Cease & Desist letter to the BORG

tommytroll — Mon, 18 Jun 2007 06:56:27 GMT

Dear BORG: It has come to my attention that you have made an unauthorized use of my copyrighted, trademarked visage entitled "GREEN" in the preparation of a work derived therefrom. I have reserved all rights in the Work, first published in the beginning of time, and have maintained my ownership by tearing to little shreds repeat violators. Your work entitled "GREEN MAN" is essentially identical to the Work and clearly used the Work as its basis. In that it wholy contains my original work of "GREEN" As you neither asked for nor received permission to use the Work as the basis for "GREEN MAN" nor to make or distribute copies, including electronic copies, of same, I believe you have willfully infringed my rights under 17 U.S.C. Section 101 et seq. and could be liable for statutory damages as high as $150,000 as set forth in Section 504(c)(2) therein. I demand that you immediately cease the use and distribution of all infringing works derived from the Work, and all copies, including electronic copies, of same, that you deliver to me, if applicable, all unused, undistributed copies of same, or destroy such copies immediately and that you desist from this or any other infringement of my rights in the future. If I have not received an affirmative response from you by July 1st indicating that you have fully complied with these requirements, I shall take further action against you. How do you like dem apples, TROLL!

Watch out San Francisco... TROLL! at Pre-Compression!

tommytroll — Tue, 05 Jun 2007 02:28:02 GMT

TROLL! been gone for a while which makes TROLL! want to defile Anything and everything that makes TROLL! smile. At Pre-Compression will TROLL! be Sneaky Sneaky and stealthily I'll see you, but can you find me? You better because otherwise Saturday Will be the last you'll see! TROLL!

TROLL! T-Shirt Contest!

tommytroll — Sun, 27 May 2007 19:17:21 GMT

What should TROLL! T-Shirt say for 2007? Not like TROLL! care what you think but it might be worth a laugh. TROLL!

Truth behind boston bomb scare revealed.

tommytroll — Fri, 23 Feb 2007 02:17:51 GMT

http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1741589

TROLL! Valentines day special pt.2: How to cook your girlfriend

tommytroll — Tue, 13 Feb 2007 11:42:24 GMT

Sloppy Jills ======== 3 tablespoons olive oil (Remember Olive Oil, she was an annoying bitch!) 1 1/2 pounds of your girlfriends ground rump, Looks good tastes better! 1 large habenero pepper, chopped to bring the spice back to the relationship 4 large garlic cloves, chopped to ward off her blood sucking parents 3 tablespoons chili powder 1 1/4 cups Pabst Blue Ribbon... nuthins too good for you baby! 3/4 cup bottled chili sauce or ketchup 1 4-ounce can diced green chilies 2 tablespoons Worcestershire sauce 1 teaspoon of daves insanity sauce (insane in the membrane!) 1 cup finely chopped green onions 6 sourdough rolls, split, toasted Heat oil in heavy large pot over medium-high heat, or just build a fire and drop the pot in it! Add your girlfriends fine ground ass, habenero pepper and garlic and sauté until her ass is no longer pink... breaking up meat with back of fork, about 10 minutes. Drain fat as needed, no more cottage cheese now! Mix in chili powder; stir 1 minute. Add next 5 ingredients. Reduce heat to medium-low and simmer until mixture thickens, stirring often, about 15 minutes. Mix in green onions; season with salt and pepper. Now grab a coffee mug or, the cap to the pitcher... anything but a ladel (why? why not?) and slap that sloppy ho on top of your roll! Serving ====== Makes 6 servings, about time she was serving your needs! Eat while watching football. Don't forget to spill some on your shirt. Take yours first then pass her around to your friends (thats right they can have sloppy seconds).

TROLL! Valentines day special pt.1: How to cook your boyfriend

tommytroll — Mon, 12 Feb 2007 09:23:18 GMT

Braised Boyfriend: ============== 1 750-ml cheap red wine (such as those that come in a box) 3 tablespoons olive oil 2 of your boyfriends shoulder cuts 1 large onion, chopped 1 large carrot (like the one you wish he had)... peeled, coarsely chopped WHAT FUN! 1 large celery stalk, chopped... like you mean it 3 garlic cloves, peeled, smashed 1 heaping tablespoon tomato paste 1 heaping tablespoon of bitter memories 14 ounces of "boyfriend broth" 2 large sprigs fresh sage 2 large sprigs fresh parsley 1 teaspoon of your tears 1 bay leaf 1/2 teaspoon whole black peppercorns Vegetables... he never ate em so now he's eaten with em! ========================================== 2 tablespoons butter 2 valiums, you'll get through this girl! 1 tablespoon olive oil 1 (1-pound) celery root (celeriac), peeled, cut into 1-inch cubes 1 pound turnips, peeled, cut into 1-inch cubes 1 pound carrots, peeled, cut into 1-inch cubes ... you're having too much fun cutting up that carrot! 2 teaspoons sugar, it makes the medicine go down! 2 tablespoons chopped fresh sage 2 tablespoons chopped fresh parsley Braised boyfriend: ============= Clean the oven like you told him to do a million times but he never did. Adjust rack to lower third of oven. Preheat to 300°F. Simmer cheap ass wine in large saucepan over medium heat until reduced to 1 cup, about 30 minutes. Meanwhile, heat oil in heavy large wide pot over medium heat. Sprinkle his shoulder cuts with salt and pepper. Add 1 shoulder to pot and cook until brown on all sides, about 13 minutes. Transfer to large plate; repeat with remaining shoulder. Spoon some of his video game playing, mcdonalds eating fat from pot Add onion, carrot, celery, tears and garlic to pot. Sprinkle with salt and pepper. sauté over medium-high heat until vegetables begin to brown, about 6 minutes. Add tomato paste; stir 1 minute. Add broth; bring to boil. Add sage, parsley, bay leaf, and peppercorns. Return shoulder meat and any accumulated juices to pot, tucking shoulder cuts to fit in single layer. Pour whats left of that cheap ass red wine over; cover. Transfer shoulders to oven and braise 1 hour 15 minutes. Turn shoulders over. Cover and braise until shoulders are tender, about 1 hour 15 minutes longer. DO AHEAD Can be made 2 days ahead, he could never make plans but you could. Cool slightly. Chill uncovered until cool (like the last 6 months of your relationship), then cover and keep chilled. Rewarm in 350°F oven until heated through, about 30 minutes. For vegetables: =========== Melt butter with oil in heavy large skillet over high heat. Add celery root, turnips, valium and carrots. Sprinkle with salt and pepper. sauté until browned in spots, about 8 minutes. Add 1 cup braising liquid from shoulder meats. Cover, reduce heat to medium, and simmer until vegetables are tender, stirring occasionally, about 10 minutes. Uncover, increase heat to high, and bring to boil. Stir in that sugar because through it all you're still sweet. Add sage and parsley and cook until sauce is reduced to glaze, stirring often, about 1 minute. Season with salt and pepper. Serving: ====== Cut shoulders into 1/2-inch-thick slices. Arrange slices on platter. Spoon vegetables around them. Drizzle some of braising liquid over meat and serve to your new boyfriend. Makes 4 servings of justice (plus leftovers).

Three screams for Mooninites!

tommytroll — Fri, 02 Feb 2007 22:38:37 GMT

TROLL! give credit where credit is due. This was BRILLIANT! Thus I officially declare all the ATHF staff TROLLS! and thus entitled to all the benefits thereof. Notice where they put their Mooninite signs? On bridges! You get TROLL!s drift? TROLL!

Sea of screams!

tommytroll — Sun, 31 Dec 2006 02:23:17 GMT

Oh yeah TROLL! be TROLLING San Francisco for New Years... TROLL hope to get many rum filled treats! So if you be seeing TROLL! at a certain party, RUN!

Har har har!

tommytroll — Thu, 30 Nov 2006 18:59:57 GMT

Sometimes TROLL! even find something that be funny that has nothing to do with TROLLING or bridges or whatever. TROLL want this T-Shirt!

TROLL tired of seeing Andre all the time

tommytroll — Wed, 22 Nov 2006 16:36:12 GMT

All da time under bridges it be da OBEY - ANDRE show all da time. WELL TROLL! NEED SOMETHIN NEW. So here it be. Dis be da new thing to put under bridges and whatnot.

AAAAARRRRARAARRARAARGHGHHGHGHGHHHHHHHHHH!

tommytroll — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 18:03:13 GMT

There is no logic. TROLL pooped it. There is no substance. TROLL ate it. There is no reason. TROLL squashed it. There is no love. TROLL scared it away. There is no hope. TROLL put it in a kettle for stew. Why can't I find my $%#@ $&* $* #@ $#^ ^&%@*$# Bridge!

troll is not feeling very trolly today

tommytroll — Mon, 06 Nov 2006 00:22:51 GMT

TROLLING THE GOLDEN GATE!

tommytroll — Fri, 06 Oct 2006 04:07:03 GMT

TROLL! is going to be at decompression. For the record TROLL! expects to be plastered through the entire event, so if you want to meet TROLL! and live, this might be the time to do it. TROLL! does not promise not to bite.

Cats out of the bag... time for dinner

tommytroll — Sat, 19 Aug 2006 04:59:49 GMT

TROLL talked too much and now TROLL will not be surprising as many people... no worries, this not affect TROLLs appetite. And for those smarty smartpants out there... don't chase TROLLs dinner away, or TROLL wont share the morsels TROLL captures with you! TROLL!

TROLL needs 500!

tommytroll — Fri, 18 Aug 2006 03:39:56 GMT

TROLL! Needs 500 people in da belly before da burn happens... so go through your friends list and introduce people to TROLL! The one who sends me the most morsels gets a playa surprise! TROLL!

TAGS have mutayted again!

tommytroll — Fri, 11 Aug 2006 15:46:52 GMT

As you may well aware... if you TAG a TROLL the TAG mutaytates into something new. TROLL has been TROLLED so here is the outcome: === Comment to this post and... 1. I’ll respond with some glib remark about you. 2. I’ll challenge you to troll a victim of my choice. 3. I’ll pick the color of the clothes you must wear the next day. 4. I’ll tell you trollness I see in you. 5. I’ll tell you if I'm ready to eat you this year or not. 6. I’ll tell you what you can do to troll better. 7. I’ll write a rhyme for you 8. If I do this for you, you must post this on yours (that's the TROLL part)

The real story behind those stupid goats

tommytroll — Thu, 03 Aug 2006 22:06:48 GMT

It be time to set the record straight. Here be how the story goes: A little goat across a bridge long ago With a titter tatter trap tap it awoke a TROLL! The troll took the goat in a fearsome grasp And the little goat cried spare my ass! The goat blathered I'll give you my brother... whos fatter than me, I do not stutter! So the TROLL sent the goat away And lounged under the bridge for a day The pitiful little goat kept his word He brought a larger goat from the herd! The TROLL was about to chomp its flesh When the slightly bigger goat offered something fresh The goat told a tale of a goat with lots of meat And the TROLLs mouth watered thinking of flesh to eat The two goats left and returned once more With a goat big enough to even the score! The goats prevailed 3 to one And the tralloped off thinking they won The TROLL was hurt but he was not dead He recovered quickly as he slept in his bed The goats told their tale and it survived the years but the story wasnt over... it ended in tears The TROLL they tricked learned its lesson when the goats crossed again... He eats em as he getsum! TROLL!

TROLL is this, TROLL is that....

tommytroll — Wed, 02 Aug 2006 19:24:00 GMT

http://monster.namedecoder.com/ http://cyborg.namedecoder.com/i http://sexy.namedecoder.com/ Oh TROLL so bored today! TROLL!

TROLL talks about eating alot...

tommytroll — Wed, 02 Aug 2006 08:25:11 GMT

BUT TROLL can also DRINK! TROLL will consume your booze Before you have a chance to think. TROLL drinks whiskey and TROLL drinks beer TROLL drinks all night with NO FEAR! Give TROLL your booze... its not like you're going to need it when you are in TROLL's belly anyway. TROLL!

Points for style

tommytroll — Mon, 24 Jul 2006 19:17:47 GMT

A morsel spoke to TROLL and said "oooh TROLL! DOn'T EaT ME! I know where Some PeoplE are preTenDing to TroLL!" And she told me about: http://www.thedenverchannel.com/news/9511801/detail.html Der is nuTHIN wRong with wantin to be a TROLL! But no amount of drugs will tuRN you into ME! AnD yes I ate her ANYway.

Hippies

tommytroll — Mon, 24 Jul 2006 12:36:42 GMT

Cooking tips for hippies... Wash your hippies before eating them. Do you know how long it takes to get the taste of petuli out of your mouth? TROLL!

TROLL has been TAGGED!

tommytroll — Wed, 28 Jun 2006 07:29:25 GMT

TROLL has been TAGGED by Dusty Nipples! But OH NO! The tag has mutayted! Tagging is now TROLLING! ***** RULES 1. Once you've been TROLLED, you have to write a blog with 8 nasty wicked disgusting or whatever facts/things/habits about yourself, saying who TROLLED you. In the end you need to choose 6 people to be TROLLED and list their names. No RE-TROLLS 2. If you have not yet jumped into TROLL's belly you must go to TROLL and add TROLL to your friends list or you will suffer a most painful humiliation http://people.tribe.net/tommytroll ***** 1) TROLL likes picking da nose. Especially when the snot gets all hard and crumbly and it pulls hairs out when extracted 2) TROLL sometimes gets heart burn... probably from eating too many kitties dipped in processed cheese 3) TROLL steals pictures of TROLLs from websites on the internet, because TROLL is lazy. 4) TROLL is a male TROLL. 5) Some people who are on TROLLs list know TROLL, some don't. Maybe 2 or 3 know that they know who TROLL is. 6) TROLL needs people to perpetuate the TROLLness of TROLL or TROLL will fade away. TROLL really really really loves testimonials! 7) TROLL knows TROLL is a bad poet. TROLL cares not. 8) TROLL tries hard to respond to every message.... but sometimes TROLL gets tired ******* OK now TROLLING 6 more people: GoddessoftheChipmunks Shay Ogre Windblad III Queen of the Harpies Powered By Atari jedi wright

Proof!

tommytroll — Fri, 26 May 2006 05:25:26 GMT

For those of you who think TROLL is kidding and this was all joke. TROLL never kids, and the joke be on you if you go under TROLL bridge!