In These Economic Times Should Urban Gay Men Give Polyamory Another Look?Thu, April 15, 2010 - 6:07 PM
Polyamorous households and families can help to remove some of the sting of urban life when gay men of all ages and social economic backgrounds pool their economic and relationship capital together so all involved in the polyamorus relationship can live in a more sane way and better enjoy the advantages of urban culture and have a better opportunity to blossom as individuals in a more secure environment, ideally with other men in more loving relationships who are not strangers. And this relationship choice can take away some of the pain, pressure, and hardship of urban life if a member of the household happens to get sick or loses their job. Of course this is not a new phenomenon. In cities like New York we have seen urban gay blacks and Latins who have come together to form houses famous in the voguing ball cultural scene. In other cities we see gangs coming together giving members a feeling that they are part of a caring family where they had none before. Also in the 1960's the phenomenon of the commune was a popular counter cultural living concept pushed and exploited by the "Hippie Culture" of free love. But perhaps what makes this a little different in the age of the political fireworks of gay marriage is the idea that some gay men are beginning to ask if there is such a thing as a gay culture that makes them dramatically unique and different from their straight counter parts. And in asking this question some gay men are petitioning and asking activist in the gay movement whether it is really worth it to be mainstreamed into society if they indeed have to totally relinquish all that makes them unique as "queer" men. And finally this train of thought leads many of these same gay men to consider creating polyamorous situations that are tailor made to their needs and desires of love and life in the new urban landscape, that many are finding lacking in true fulfillment. To be sure, I have seen and read about many such family situations developing especially in the queer leather and fetish communities. It is of interest to me and other observers to wonder if the future will prompt more progressive thinking gay men to consider moving toward more communal poly lifestyles that could clearly provide a challenge to conventional ways of defining successful loving relationships, and ways of living with others, especially in the current economic climate that often adversely affects the quality of life for so many gay men in American urban settings.
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Yep, this sounds reasonableAs long as everyone in the household understands the rules, sexual or otherwise. It does, however, fly in the face of gay marriage.