Beauty in Random Places, or...the happiest of Valentines Days

Today's Dear Abby ......

DEAR ABBY: I clearly remember my first Valentine's Day. I was in first grade. A few days before, my mom asked how many kids were in my class, and we went to a store and bought large packages of valentines -- one for every child in the class. The cards were all the same size and said, basically, the same thing.

When I arrived at school, each classmate had a small box on his or her desk. At some point during the day, I went around the room and gave each child a valentine. There was one for the quiet one in the back, the most popular girl in class, the prettiest and even the boys. This was long before society taught me that such a show of affection had to exclude people of the same gender as me. By the end of the day, everyone had a full box of valentines to take home.

One desk, one box ... the love of a child.

As I grew older, society taught me to narrow my offering of affection, picking only those I chose to be special or worthy. Eventually, I was taught to limit my valentines to only one person. More time went on, and then a card was not enough. To show that really special person what she meant to you, you needed to send flowers, candy and jewelry.

Apparently, as we grew older it took more and more to fill those boxes. Now we absolutely could not give to more than one person. People hire detectives to make sure that the person isn't filling anyone else's. And if you had no one to send you anything, you were saddened by your big, empty box filled only with sadness and despair.

Today, I am taking back from society what it has taken from me. I'm counting how many people play a role in my life, and I am buying "virtual" packages of cards. I have one for every single one of you -- man or woman, young or old, straight or gay, married or single. Each card is the same size, they all say the same thing -- that I appreciate who you are and what you have to contribute to each other.
I invite each and every one to do the same, so that no box is empty and the shy ones, the pretty ones, the popular ones and those who are less so go home tonight with a full box of valentines.

One virtual desk, one virtual box, and the love of a child at heart. I wish you all a happy Valentine's Day. -- ERIC IN LOS ALAMITOS, CALIF.

This brought tears to my eyes. Yeah, Im a sap. I hate V-Day but this reminded me that it can be a very sweet day as well.

To all of you, my friends, my family...I wish you the sweetest of days. I wish I could number all the ways you brighten my life, but the list would be long indeed. I love you all. Happy Valentine's Day.

Road Hazards!

Edward, this made me think of you....

news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090...gns_zombies

Pranks involving electronic road signs stir worry

By JIM SUHR, Associated Press Writer
Wed Feb 4, 4:36 pm ET
COLLINSVILLE, Ill. – Pranksters in at least three states are messing with electronic road signs meant to warn motorists of possible traffic problems by putting drivers on notice about Nazi zombies and raptors. And highway safety officials aren't amused.

The latest breach came Tuesday during the morning rush hour near Collinsville, Ill., where hackers changed a sign along southbound Interstate 255 to read, "DAILY LANE CLOSURES DUE TO ZOMBIES."

A day earlier in Indiana's Hamilton County, the electronic message on a board in Carmel's construction zone warned drivers of "RAPTORS AHEAD — CAUTION."

And signs in Austin, Texas, recently flashed: "NAZI ZOMBIES! RUN!!!" and "ZOMBIES IN AREA! RUN."

Officials in Illinois are concerned the rewritten signs distract motorists from heeding legitimate hazards down the road. The hacked sign on Tuesday originally warned drivers of crews replacing guardrails.

"We understood it was a hoax, but at the same time those boards are there for a reason," said Joe Gasaway, an Illinois Department of Transportation supervisory field engineer. "We don't want (drivers) being distracted by a funny sign."

Authorities haven't figured out how pranksters access the signs. Gasaway believes the Illinois sign was changed remotely, and Austin Public Works spokeswoman Sara Hartley suspected the hackers there cut a padlock to get into the signs' computers.

Some Web sites, such as Jalopnik.com, have published tutorials titled "How to Hack an Electronic Road Sign" as a way to alert security holes to traffic-safety officials. Jalopnik urges its readership of 2.6 million a month not to put its lesson to practice.

"Hacking generally is about showing where there are holes in security systems, and I think this is a great example of that," the site's editor-in-chief, Ray Wert, told The Associated Press by telephone Wednesday. "I'm sure there are all sorts of ways to use that information in a way that's inappropriate, but we're trying to make clear this is an issue that needs to be confronted by traffic safety and transportation officials."
Wert said he had no immediate plans to take down Jalopnik's how-to guide.

In Illinois, tampering with an official traffic control device is a misdemeanor punishable by up to a $250 fine — half what a culprit might have to pay in Texas if caught. If convicted in Indiana, a culprit faces up to a year in jail and $5,000 in fines.

Pretty Boys

courtesy of my very badass friend, Janice.

I can't stop watching. He's just so pretty.

www.youtube.com/watch



(and for your viewing pleasure, I've also posted this picture of Robert Downey Jr....also a very pretty boy)

I <heart> these stupid quizzes

7 Deadly Sins Survey

**WRATH**

1. Who did you last get angry with?
myself

2. What is your weapon of choice?
the one I *want* to use...the staplegun, of course. the one I most commonly use...self-wounding thoughts

3. Would you hit a member of the opposite sex?
does he need it? hell yes.

4. How about of the same sex?
yes, but I doubt it would be as satisfying. unless it was with a car or was a one of a couple of verrrry specific women.

5. Who was the last person who got really angry at you?
Ian. I wouldn't let him play with my computer, so he told me to go to my room.

6. What is your pet peeve?
people who say 'orientate'.

7. Do you keep grudges, or can you let them go easily?
I've tried to give up grudges and switched to 'forgive but never forget.' Ive been told Im 'too nice'. Im working on that.


**SLOTH**

1. What is one thing you're supposed to do daily that you haven't?
Breathe

2. What is the latest you've ever woken up?
middle of the afternoon

3. Name a person you've been meaning to contact, but haven't?
a lot of people.

4. What is the last lame excuse you made?
I'm too tired.

5. Have you ever watched an infomercial all the way through?
Probably.

6. When was the last time you got in a good workout?
Friday evening.

7. How many times did you snooze your alarm clock today?
today's sunday.

**GLUTTONY**

1. What is your overpriced Yuppie beverage of choice?
quad shot caramel macchiato

2. Meat eaters: white meat or dark meat?
Red.

3. What is the greatest amount of alcohol you've had in one night?
a lot.

4. Have you ever used a professional diet company?
Weight Watchers.

5. Do you have an issue with your weight?
not as much as other people seem to have with it.

6. Do you prefer sweets, salty foods, or spicy foods?
salty.

7. Have you ever looked at a small house pet and thought "lunch"?
this is a stupid question.


**LUST**

1. How many people have you seen naked?
Why is this in the Lust category?

2. How many people have seen YOU naked?
See above.

3. Have you ever caught yourself staring at someones chest/crotch?
only if it appears they're smuggling a schnauzer.

4. Have you "done it"?
define 'it'.

5. What is your favorite body part on a person of your gender?
Breasts are so pretty. And really great hair.

6. Have you ever been propositioned by a prostitute?
No. But I've been propositioned AS a prostitute. This guy in Berkeley thought I was a domme.

7. Have you ever had to get tested for an STD or pregnancy?
of course. Im a fertile woman who has been sexually active.


**GREED**

1. How many credit cards do you own?
none

2. What's your guilty pleasure store?
any bookstore. though to be honest, there is little to no guilt involved.

3. If you had $10 million, what would you do with it?
be debt free. donate. invest. help my family and friends. buy a house. get a really badass tattoo.

4. Would you rather be rich, or famous?
duh. rich.

5. Would you accept a boring job if it meant you would make megabucks?
possibly but only for the short term.

6. Have you ever stolen anything?
Depends on who you ask

7. How many MP3s are on your hard drive?
a lot.


**PRIDE**

1. What's one thing you have done that you're most proud of?
going back to college in my 30s

2. What is one thing you have done that your parents are most proud of?
probably the above

3. What things would you like to accomplish in your life?
inner peace. not falling out of tree pose.

4. Do you get annoyed by coming in second place?
In relationships, yes.

5. Have you ever entered a contest knowing you would win?
No.

6. Have you ever cheated on something to get a higher score?
probably a math test in middle school.

7. What did you do today that you're proud of?
I lived. I laughed. I had the soup.


**ENVY**

1. What item does your friend have that you want?
a good husband. Not her good husband, though.

2. Who would you want to go on "Trading Spaces" with?
Lizzer

3. If you could be anyone else in the world, who would you be?
why would I want to be someone else? I just want to be my best me.

4. Have you ever been cheated on?
Yes.

5. Have you ever wished you had a different physical feature?
duh. yes.

6. What trait in others do you wish you had for yourself?
peace

7. Do you wish you'd come up with this survey?
no. this is kind of a lame survey.

Finally, what's your favorite deadly sin?
I don't believe in sin.

A Quote for Today

"Hurricanes of Yes are never blocked by the flimsy screen doors of But Why." --Mark Morford

I read this yesterday and it's stuck, ringing in my thoughts. Why do we always seem to doubt the Yeses? What is it inside us that won't let us accept them? Why do we need to mitigate yeses with whys and rationalise nos with excuses and reasons? I have some thoughts on that but Im still wrapping my brain around them. It has to do with doubt and fear and Imaginary Friends and 'what will people say??" and soul sucking jobs and fast food and not letting the wind fuck up our hair and the rain fall on our faces nearly enough.

Yes, goddamnit!

The Webinox is upon us!

Happy Mfkin' Birthday to me!

Im 40 today. It's a weird thing. When the hell did it happen??? It feels like just a few minutes ago I was having my first legal drink at 21. Im not freaked out about being 40 though. I know far too many amazing women in their 40s who are badass examples of it. It's making me reflect and realise that all those things I thought I'd have or be by 40 that I don't yet have and aren't yet? They don't matter. I'd probably enjoy them if they were real but despite how hard this year has been, I like who I am becoming.

This year has been so hard, and not just for me. People losing loved ones, losing homes and jobs, being ill. I've decided that 2009 is going to be an amazing year. There is going to be growth. There will be changes. There will be love. And art. And music. And laughter. And velvet. And abundance. And peace, and hope, and orgasms, and puppy kisses, and silliness, and fresh grass under our toes. And joy, deep down, bone-tingling Joy with a capital J. And we're not just going to have those things, we're going to have More Of Them. Because I know that we already have those things...they're right there in front of us if only we can See them. All we have to do is reach out and grab them and wrap our brains around them and let them be ours. We don't even have to fight for them. We just have to accept them. I think that's the hard thing...accepting.

I've always felt like my birthday was a huge transition, like it's not just me that gets the gift of a brand new year. The whole world does. Tomorrow morning we open the door to 2009. A whole sparkly, shiny brand new year. It's like we get to call 'do overs'. How cool is that?

So, I've got some really fun plans for today. Im going to play and be silly and laugh and hang out with people I love. As far as Im concerned, that's the best way to start manifesting all the great stuff Im gonna have in my new year. Do overs!!!

Happy New Year everybody.

Frantic?

I heard/read this for the first time this morning and it hit me hard.

www.youtube.com/watch

Rushing and racing
and running in circles
Moving so fast, I'm forgetting my purpose
Blur of the traffic is sending me spinning
Getting nowhere

My head and my heart are colliding, chaotic
Pace of the world
I just wish I could stop it
Try to appear like I've got it together
I'm falling apart

Save me
Somebody take my hand, and lead me
Slow me down
Don't let love pass me by
Just show me how
'Cause I'm ready to fall
Slow me down
Don't let me live a lie
Before my life flies by
I need you to slow me down

Sometimes I fear that I might disappear
In the blur of fast forward I falter again
Forgetting to breathe, I need to sleep
I'm getting nowhere

All that I've missed I see in the reflection
Passed me while I wasn't paying attention
Tired of rushing, racing and running
I'm falling apart

Tell me
Oh won't you take my hand and lead me
Slow me down
Don't let love pass me by
Just show me how
'Cause I'm ready to fall
Slow me down
Don't let me live a lie
Before my life flies by
I need you to slow me down

Just show me
I need you to slow me down

The noise of the world is getting me caught up
Chasing the clock and I wish I could stop it
Just need to breathe, somebody please
Slow me down

R.I.P. Majel

It's too soon. You'll be missed.

Majel Barrett Roddenberry died today.

Stuck in my head this morning...

...as I drove to work.

www.youtube.com/watch

Quisiera darte el mundo entero,
La luna, el cielo, el sol y el mar
Regalarte las estrellas en una caja de cristal.

Llevarte al espacio Sideral
Y volar como lo hace Superman.

Quisiera ser un super héroe
Y protegerte contra el mal,
Regalarte la vía láctea en un plato de cereal.

Llevarte al espacio sideral
Y volar como lo hace Superman.

Me tienes tan debilitada
Todas mis fuerzas se me van si estas aquí
Y mis poderes no son nada
Me siento tan normal, tan frágil, tan real
Me elevas al espacio sideral...

Tal como lo hace Superman...

Quisiera hacerte un gran poema
Y usar el cielo de papel,
Tomar las nubes como crema
Y hornearte un super pastel.

Llevarte al espacio Sideral
Y volar como lo hace Superman.

Me tienes tan debilitada
Todas mis fuerzas se me van si estas aquí
Y mis poderes no son nada
Me siento tan normal, tan frágil, tan real
Me elevas al espacio sideral...

Me tienes tan enamorada
Todas mis fuerzas se me van si estás aquí
Y mis poderes no son nada
Me siento tan normal, tan frágil, tan real
Me siento tan normal, tan frágil, tan real
Me elevas al espacio Sideral...

Tal como lo hace Superman...

Thought of the Day

'Whatever you give a woman, she's going to multiply.

If you give her a house, she'll give you a home.

If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal.

If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart.

She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her.'

So - if you give her crap, you will receive more shit than any one human being can handle